


A Carefree Beachgoer

by Recyclops



Category: Alice in Chains, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden (Band)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-09
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-02-12 15:37:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 29
Words: 21,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12962598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Recyclops/pseuds/Recyclops
Summary: Eddie wants to escape from his abusive girlfriend, and Chris wants to find true love. Will they find what they want among each other?





	1. 1

**Chris’ POV**  
  
If my boyfriend moaned any louder, he would’ve woken up our neighbors. But that wasn’t to say I wanted him to quiet down. I loved his voice, and I loved hearing it while we fucked. No matter how much he tried to keep quiet, he’d lose control and shout my name.  
  
My hands were on his hips as he moved up and down on me. I used one of them to stroke his length, starting off slow before picking up only a little speed to match his rhythm.  
  
“Mmm… faster,” he moaned, his hand on top of mine while I complied, stroking his length faster. His breathing got heavier and he cried out my name right before he came, his seed all over my chest and my hand.  
  
It didn’t take much longer for me to do the same. The blonde lay down on his back and I entered him again. After only a few forceful thrusts, I reached my climax, groaning his name and releasing my seed inside him. I pulled out and fell beside him on the bed, trying to catch my breath. His face nuzzled in the crook of my neck and he planted soft kisses against my skin.  
  
“I’m going to take a shower. Are you coming with me?” He got up from the bed and headed towards the bathroom.   
  
I didn’t see why not, so I followed him into the shower where we fucked again before getting back in bed. He rested his head on my chest while his fingers brushed against my chest.   
  
“I love you, Layne,” I said, running a hand through his curly hair.  
  
“I love you too, Chris,” he spoke drowsily.   
  
The warmth of his body felt so good. There was no other place I would have rather been or any other person I would have rather been with.   
  
The moment I thought he had fallen asleep, I heard his gentle voice.  
  
“Nothing’s ever gonna separate us,” he asked, his voice very close to a whisper. “Right, Chris?”  
  
“No. Nothing ever will. I promise." 


	2. 2

**Eddie’s POV**  
  
I collapsed on my living room couch and let out a heavy, relieved sigh. I finished cleaning up the entire apartment before my girlfriend got home from work. If I didn’t, I would've heard the usual put-downs from her about how I was useless, pathetic, never did anything right, and the like. For the most part, I could ignore it and not let it get to me. There were rare instances where her words would cut me deep. I never gave her the satisfaction of seeing me react either way. The less I said and the less I did, the less of her I had to deal with.  
  
As I began to doze off, she stormed through the door and slammed it, startling me out of the start of my nap. She dropped her bag on the floor and walked past me, cursing under her breath. I shut my eyes again and pretended to be asleep, hoping she wouldn’t take her fury out on me.  
  
“EDDIE!” I heard her shout from the kitchen.   
  
I sighed, got up, and went over to her, spinning a wheel in my head to guess what aspect of me she would insult.  
  
“I like what you did with the place,” she said, opening two bottles of beer. She walked over to me and handed me one. “It looks great in here.”  
  
I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to be surprised or relieved. She wasn’t berating me, but she was praising me. She was smiling at me. I couldn’t remember the last time she did anything like that around me. I bit my lip to hold back a smile. I must have forgotten how good it felt to be appreciated.   
  
But I couldn't help but find it odd. I thought she was pissed when she walked in, but that didn't appear to be the case anymore. Either I was wrong or her mood did change. It wasn't the first time that happened, as I was more used to the complete opposite occurring. She was happy one moment, then infuriated the next. Thankfully, that wasn't one of those times.  
  
Later on, we were sitting on the couch together, knocking back beer after beer as we talked about whatever came to our minds. From what I could recall, it was the first time in awhile that we were happily in the same room together. If not that, then those moments only seemed rare to me because I focused more on the shitty moments we had. After all, they were much more frequent than us behaving like an actual couple, let alone sitting together and talking. I preferred moments like that. Thinking about it all bothered me. Why couldn’t they last longer? Why couldn’t they happen more often?   
  
I didn't realize I was staring off into space and tuning her out until she asked, "You alright, Eddie?"  
  
“Um… Y-yeah,” I lied.  
  
“Are you sure?” I flinched even though she gently touched the side of my face.  
  
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired.” Was that a lie? I was very tired, but things were not alright, and I didn't want to talk about it. Not at the moment, and not with her. Questions like that annoyed me, particularly while I felt low, and I wanted her to stop asking them. I wanted many things from her. So many things. But I wanted to stop thinking about all that for a while.  
  
I got up from the couch and went into the bedroom. I crawled into bed and shortly drifted off to sleep. 


	3. 3

**Chris’ POV**  
  
“Come on, Chris,” Layne whined, playfully tugging my arm and waking me up. “Get up.”  
  
I yawned and rubbed my eyes, still in the mood to stay in bed. “Okay, okay... I’m up.”  
  
“You've been saying that for half an hour, you liar.”  
  
“Hey,” I turned towards him. “I’m mentally preparing myself to get out of bed, now please stop rushing me.”  
  
He rolled his eyes as he let go of my arm. “Make up excuses, why don’t you?”  
  
I looked at the digital clock on the nightstand, and it was 8:43 pm. I jumped out of bed almost instantly and pulled the curtains open. Sure enough, the sun already set. There were stars, some bright and some dim, scattered across the night sky. So much for getting ready for work, because I missed about 11 hours of it.  
  
“So what are you getting dressed up for?” I sat down on the edge of the bed in front of Layne, who was putting on a pair of black boots.   
  
“I’m meeting Jerry, Ruth, and her cute boyfriend at the bar. Do you want to come?”  
  
I groaned and lay down on my back. “But I’m tired.”  
  
“Oh, come on. It’ll be fun! And wait until you see Ruth’s boyfriend. He’s really cute!”  
  
“Ehh… I already have a cute boyfriend.”  
  
He giggled and blushed, thus proving my point. “Just-- Just come with me, Chris. Besides, you’re my ride.”  
  
“And your designated driver if I don’t drink anything,” I added as I got up, figuring that tagging along wouldn’t hurt. 


	4. 4

**Eddie’s POV**  
  
“Eddie…” Ruth’s soft whisper and gentle touch on my shoulder woke me up. “Eddie, I’m gonna go out for a little while. Do you want to come with me?”  
  
“Where are you going?”  
  
“That bar we usually go to. At the corner of Delta and Pearl? Layne and Jerry are gonna be there.”  
  
“Oh yeah,” I muttered, climbing out of bed to get dressed.  
  
I figured going along with her would get me a break from being inside all the time. While she was at work, I stayed home to clean, cook, or do whatever else needed to be done around the apartment. Other than that, I only stayed home because she hated the idea of me being out of the house. She once said she worried about me cheating on her or finding another girlfriend. At first, I didn’t think she needed to worry about those things ever happening. But after over three years with her, I’ve been longing for something new. Something better. Something that wasn’t mentally and emotionally draining me.  
  
When we arrived, we went to the booth in the back we always sat in. Jerry and Layne were already there, but I couldn’t help but stare at the unfamiliar, handsome face among them. He was in the middle of telling a story of some sort to the other two but stopped when he noticed us.  
  
“Oh, hey Ruth,” he greeted her before looking at me. His clear, blue eyes stared into mine for what felt like forever. It was like he and I were the only ones in the room. Something about the way he looked at me made my cheeks get warm. The inviting look in his eyes made me feel good, in a way. I wanted to get to know him. I wanted to say hello, but I was afraid of stuttering. He probably thought I was mute or something since all I did was stare at him.  
  
“Chris, this is Eddie, the guy I told you about earlier,” Layne’s voice snapped me out of my trance. If it wasn’t for him, my first “encounter” with this man would likely have been my very awkward last.  
  
It took me a second to process that Chris was Layne’s boyfriend, the same Chris he would always talk to me about. Based off what he told me, he was a sweet, funny, sexy guy who was incredible in bed. After seeing him with my own eyes for the first time, I could confirm that he was certainly attractive.  
  
“It’s very nice to meet you, Eddie,” Chris scooted over, offering me a seat next to him.  
  
“Nice to meet you too.” As I sat next to him, Ruth returned with some beer for all five of us. Then there were two conversations going on at the same time. Ruth and Layne were discussing some local band, and Chris and Jerry were talking about something I couldn’t listen in enough to identify. As it got later in the night, more people showed up, and the whole bar got louder. I didn’t want to drink anything, and I wasn’t that interested in joining any of the conversations going on around me. All I could do was try to tolerate the noise of everyone in the room.   
  
After a while, I couldn’t stand it and went outside, knowing it would be less noisy out there. The commotion from inside wasn’t as bad as I stepped into the cool, evening air. I sat on the front of my car, taking a deep breath as I looked up at the starry night sky.   
  
I never cared for loud, crowded places, and with that in mind, I began to regret coming along with Ruth. She rarely invited me to go anywhere with her. When she did, she would avoid me and only acknowledge me when she needed something like she always would. I could’ve taken the car home and went back to bed, but I couldn’t leave her behind. I also could’ve walked home since we lived only a few blocks away, but then she would have to put herself in danger by driving home drunk. I assumed that was exactly why she woke me up to begin with. I didn’t come because I was her friend, much less her boyfriend. I came because I was her ride.  
  
A few minutes later, I heard someone’s footsteps approaching me. I didn’t bother to see who it was, but when they spoke, I realized who it was.  
  
“Are you doing alright, Eddie?” Chris came over and sat beside me.  
  
I shook my head and continued to stare at the sky.  
  
“You should come have a beer with us. You might feel better.”  
  
I shook my head again. “Nah… I can’t. Sorry.”  
  
“Why is that? If… you don’t mind me asking, of course.”  
  
“Because I have to drive my girlfriend home,” I said, regretting calling her my girlfriend, despite it being true.  
  
“You don’t sound very eager to call her your girlfriend.”  
  
“I mean, it’s not that,” I lied because he was right. “It’s just--”  
  
I couldn’t finish my sentence. Was I about to vent about my relationship to a complete stranger? Did Chris really care enough to listen to it all? And what if he was close friends with her? For all I knew, he could've told her everything he heard and piss her off. I didn’t need to give her any more reasons to hate me, as I was sure merely existing was on the very top of her presumably long list.  
  
“It’s just what?” He asked.  
  
“It’s a long story. That’s what it is.”  
  
“Then I want to hear it.”  
  
I looked at him before rolling my eyes. “Trust me, you don’t.”  
  
“What makes you think so?”  
  
“My skepticism of a complete stranger wanting to hear about my shitty relationship?”  
  
He went quiet for a moment. Admittedly, I was being standoffish towards him. Not because I didn’t want to talk to him or be around him. I did want someone to talk to. I wanted someone who would actually listen to me instead of either pushing me away or comparing my problems to theirs, claiming that I had it easy compared to them. And that person was sitting right next to me, telling me that he wanted to listen, yet I was too stubborn to believe it.  
  
“Well, I don’t blame you for not believing me right away, Eddie. I know it seems weird because we just met, but I do care, and if something’s wrong, you can tell me if you’re comfortable. If you’re not, then that’s fine.” He got up and walked toward the doorway of the bar before turning around. “But, just know you can always come to me if something’s wrong. So don’t ever think for a second that no one cares.”  
  
For the rest of that evening, I kicked myself for pushing away the only person who cared. 


	5. 5

**Chris’ POV**  
  
Man, that guy Eddie was sexy. When Layne told me who he was, I was disappointed when I realized he was taken. Ruth was one lucky woman to have such a cute guy as her boyfriend. I’ll admit, I did try to get in his pants that night at least once, but gave up when I knew it was no use.   
  
I didn’t mean it when I said I cared at first. But every time I recalled him saying his relationship with his girlfriend was shitty, I started to care more. The more I cared, the more I grew curious about what exactly was wrong. He seemed upset the other night, and not hearing from him or Ruth for almost two days worried me. I wanted to see if he was okay.   
  
I had to talk to him again. But where the hell was I going to find him in the middle of the afternoon?  
  
I decided to walk to Eddie’s place, hoping he was home. If Ruth was, then I’d have to wait until he and I miraculously crossed paths again or something.  
  
Fortunately, he was home alone. He was hesitant to let me inside, asking if anyone followed me on my way.  
  
“No, no one followed me," I told him. "Why?"  
  
He slammed and locked the door the second I walked into his apartment. “Uh, nothing, forget it.”  
  
“Do you do that a lot when you have people over?”  
  
“Huh?” he turned around and gave me a puzzled look.   
  
“Do you always lock the door like that when people come over?”  
  
“Oh, sorry about that. I know it's odd, but it’s... um… a lot to explain.”  
  
Eddie wasn’t acting the same way he was the other night. He was still very shy, but he looked afraid. What or who he was afraid of was what I couldn’t figure out. Then, something in the back of my mind told me it was his girlfriend. Right before I could ask, he spoke first.  
  
“Can I get you anything?” he asked while in the kitchen.  
  
“No thanks, I’m fine.”  
  
He came back to the living room with a can of beer and sat across from me. I couldn’t help but notice the left side of his face looked a bit red. As if someone hit him there. He caught me staring at it, and I looked away.  
  
“So, what brought you here, Chris? Not that I mind you visiting me.”  
  
I wasn’t prepared for that question. What was I supposed to say?  _At first, I wanted to fuck you, but then I remembered you’re in a bad relationship and now I’m concerned?_  
  
“It’s… about my girlfriend, isn’t it?” he spoke in a lower voice as if he didn't want someone hearing us, even though we were the only ones in the apartment.  
  
“I’ll be honest, that is kinda why I came to see you. Now? Now I have even more questions to ask.”  
  
His eyes were glued to the floor, his voice caught in his throat. “She-- she hit me.” 


	6. 6

**Eddie’s POV  
 _Two nights ago_**  
  
After a few minutes, I went back inside to look for Chris. Maybe he was someone I could talk to about everything. He seemed trustworthy and caring. Even though he was a stranger, for the most part, he was the only person I could say such things about.   
  
I bumped and squeezed my way through the crowded room back to where we sat, but he wasn’t there. It looked as though I really did push him away.  
  
“You look like something’s bothering you. What’s wrong?” Jerry asked before taking a drag from his cigarette.  
  
“Are you alright, Eddie?” Layne wrapped an arm around me. While his touch was a little comforting, I still wanted to find Chris.  
  
“I’m okay,” I sighed.  
  
I scanned the room to try and find him, a tall man with long hair, wearing a black shirt, black shorts, and black boots. These details didn’t make him stand out in the crowd much, but I eventually saw him walking back outside. Rushing as fast as I could through the crowd, I made it back outside, but he was nowhere to be found.   
  
I gave up, choosing instead to find Ruth so we could go home. That was when I turned back around and noticed my car wasn’t where I parked it. Before I began panicking, I recalled giving Ruth the keys for whatever reason. I hoped at the very least she had the car, which was strange because I didn’t remember passing by her at any point during the night.  
  
“Oh, Eddie,” Jerry came outside with his keys in his hand. “I was just about to tell you Ruth went home.”  
  
“I figured. I almost thought my car was stolen.”  
  
“I bet,” he laughed. “I’m gonna head home too. I can give you a ride if you want.”  
  
“Uh, alright. Thank you.”  
  
We didn’t say much during the ride, and the ride wasn’t that long. When he dropped me off in front of my apartment, I thanked him again before going inside.  
  
I took the elevator to my third-floor apartment. When I stepped out, the sound of faint moaning caught my attention. As I walked down the hall, it got louder. I walked slower and followed the noise until I reached my door, where it sounded the loudest. The door wasn’t locked. It wasn’t even shut, just slightly cracked. I gently pushed it open. There were clothes on the floor, forming a messy path to the bedroom. Then I felt my heartbeat grow faster when I realized what was going on in there. I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to storm into the room, but I didn’t entirely know what to expect. I didn’t know what to say, or what to do. What would she do? What was she going to say to me? And who was she in there with?  
  
I took deep breaths, trying to calm myself down and keep myself from crying. I held the doorknob with one of my quivering hands and slammed it with every ounce of rage inside me.  
  
The noise instantly stopped. There were muffled voices inside the room before a man ran out and into the hallway, holding his clothes against him and wearing only his pants. Ruth stood outside the room, wearing a short, blue nightgown and smoking a cigarette. I could feel her eyes on me, but I couldn’t bear to look back at her. I was still trying my best not to say anything or cry, despite how bad I wanted to do both. I never talked back to her or shed a tear in front of her. Something told me that this was no time to start, but I couldn’t take holding in all of my anger and pain caused by her any longer.  
  
She casually walked up to me and stopped just a couple inches from my face. She put the cigarette to her lips, inhaling before puffing the smoke into my face.  
  
“You… aren’t gonna say anything?” she asked smugly. “Not gonna tell me about how I broke your heart, or--”  
  
“You already did that a very long time ago,” I had it. I couldn’t stand staying silent and keeping everything to myself. There was so much more I wanted to say to her, but those were all the words I could force out of my mouth.  
  
She cocked an eyebrow and giggled. “Aww, Eddie. You poor, delicate thing. Why don’t you cry to one of your friends about it? Oh, wait! Last time I checked, you don’t fucking have any.”  
  
She willingly cheated on me. I knew she did because her demeanor said it all. She didn’t give a shit. She didn’t give a shit about me, my feelings, or our relationship.  
  
“Is that all?” she took another drag from her cigarette, blowing more smoke into my face. “Not that that’s surprising. You were always spineless anyway, Eddie.”  
  
She turned around and returned to the bedroom, turning off the light and shutting the door. For the first time during our relationship, I didn’t sleep in the same bed as her.  
  
\----------  
  
 ** _The next morning_**  
  
I went through a repeated cycle of falling asleep and waking up the whole night until about 10 am. I couldn’t get what happened the night before out of my head. No matter what I thought of, that small altercation would always come up.   
  
I needed to get out of there. I needed to pack all the shit I could and just leave. I may not have had anywhere to go, but I couldn’t stand living under the same roof as her any longer.  
  
I sat up and looked around the apartment. The bedroom door was open and the rest of the place was silent, so I assumed she left the house. My eyes were heavy, and I wanted to go to bed. I thought that was a good idea until I remembered what happened in that bed as I got home last night. I considered sleeping on the couch, but my neck didn’t feel too good after my constant attempts to do so throughout the night. If I couldn’t go to sleep, then all I could really do was wake myself up a bit.  
  
After I took a shower and got dressed, the telephone rang. I didn’t recognize the person who called at all.  
  
“Is Ruth there?” the unfamiliar voice asked.  
  
“No, she’s not.” How many other guys did she know anyway?  
  
He was silent for a moment. “Well… can I get my jacket back?”  
  
“What? What jacket?” I looked around the apartment and noticed a black, leather jacket on the recliner. “Oh, I didn’t notice that jacket.”  
  
For some reason, he hung up on me. Less than a minute later, someone knocked on the door. When I answered it, I was startled by this man’s height. He had to be at least 6 feet tall.   
  
“Uh, I’m Sean. You were just on the phone with me a minute ago.”  
  
He had long, wavy hair, and a nose ring. I didn’t recognize his face, but something about him was familiar. But then it hit me: Sean was the guy I caught her cheating with. I let him in to retrieve his jacket. Before he left, he turned around and looked at me.  
  
“Wait a minute,” his eyes widened. “You’re Ruth’s boyfriend?”  
  
I looked away from him and sighed. “I wouldn’t go as far as to say that anymore.”  
  
“Oh yeah, that makes sense. But listen, I’m sorry about last night.”  
  
“You shouldn’t be the one apologizing to me. It’s not like you cheated on me.”  
  
“I know, but I mean about her. She didn’t even tell me she was taken. I asked, and she said she was single, man.”  
  
“Is that so?” I bit my lip and nodded. I would have been lying if I said I didn’t get even more enraged than I already was with her.  
  
“Yeah. Well, um… I’ll… see you around?” he said quizzically. “Sorry, there’s no non-awkward way for me to say goodbye, so…”  
  
He turned around and walked away as I closed the door. I needed to figure out what I was going to do. I wasn’t sure if I should’ve packed a few personal items with me, as most of what was in the apartment either had no real owner or was shared between her and I. “Shared” was probably the wrong term to use, since she usually claimed nearly everything, even some things that actually belonged to me.  
  
After taking a good look around the place, I took my time as I packed all my clothes and a few other essential things. she wouldn’t come home until the afternoon or evening, depending on how long she had to work or what she had to do after work. Then it struck me that she never even told me where she worked. For some reason, I never thought to ask her either. Maybe she dropped some hints here and there and I never bothered to remember. Regardless, it was too late for me to care, as I had more important things to deal with.  
  
Just as I finished packing and walked out the room, the sound of a key by the door caught me by surprise. For some reason, she was home early.  
  
She opened the door, holding a black plastic bag in her free hand, and stopped when she saw me. Her eyes went to my bag, then back at me as she smirked.  
  
“What’s that in your hand?” she put her bag on the floor next to the counter. “And where are you going with it?”  
  
As I took another step towards the door, she rushed over, slamming it shut and leaning against it.  
  
“I don’t really care though, but just know that you’re not going anywhere,” she spoke bluntly.  
  
“Ruth, you need to move.”  
  
“I meant it when I said you’re not going anywhere.”  
  
“Ruth--”  
  
“Do I need to repeat myself?”  
  
“Why are you doing this? Could you just let me leave?”  
  
She shook her head.  
  
I didn’t get it. Not one bit. She wanted to sleep with other men while at the same time keeping me on a leash of some sort. She was clearly attracted to other people, but why wouldn’t she let me leave?  
  
“You might as well put that bag down because you’re not going anywhere.”  
  
“Let me leave.” I tried not to sound upset and tried to keep calm.  
  
“No.”  
  
“Let me leave,” I repeated, a little louder than the last time.  
  
“Nope.”  
  
Our voices got louder as this went on. She wouldn’t get out the way, and I wouldn’t give in until she did. This was the only time I ever yelled at her. It was usually her who did the yelling, the cursing, and the screaming. I just stood quietly, avoiding retaliation or making things worse than they needed to be. But this time was different.  
  
“Don’t you fucking raise your voice at me!” she pushed me, but not hard enough to make me move.  
  
Then she reached out and slapped me across my face. It took me a second to process what just happened. Out of all the things she had done to me before, using physical force like that was not one of them. At least that was what I assumed before then. The left side of my face was hot and started to sting. It began to hurt a little more than I thought it would.  
  
She looked stunned, her eyes wide and her mouth agape as if she was thinking to herself that she shouldn’t have done what she did.  
  
“Eddie…” she couldn’t say another word. She tried to touch the side of my face, but I swatted her hand away. I didn’t want her to touch me. I didn’t want her to talk to me. No amount of apologizing or anything in the world would have convinced me to forgive her for everything she did to me, much less hitting me. I’ve gotten upset at her countless times, but I never felt the need to hit her. Why would she do that to me? Was she not satisfied with how much she hurt me already?  
  
My heart was pounding in my chest and my tears began to obstruct my vision. On other occasions, I would have prevented her from seeing me cry, but this time I didn’t care. I didn’t have to look at her, but I wanted her to look at me. For the first time, she would see me in pain with her own eyes. I wanted her to see how much she hurt me, and how much misery I had to endure for three years because of her. I wanted her to feel guilty, whether it was for the rest of the day or for the rest of her life. I wanted her to see what she put me through.  
  
She was silent, but only after a minute did she speak again.  
  
“I should just go…” She turned around and left the apartment.


	7. 7

**Chris’ POV**  
  
I held Eddie close to me as he sobbed. After hearing what he told me up to that point, it was all much worse than I thought. The worst part of it was that Ruth was a very close friend of mine. I couldn’t imagine her being abusive to her boyfriend, or anyone else. Maybe I was then hearing about her true self. She had no right to treat him like shit. I would have been a bit more skeptical in any other case because we were close friends. But the bruise on his face didn't lie.  
  
“I want to leave,” he rested his head against my shoulder and looked up at the ceiling. “I don’t fucking care where, I just want to go far, far away.”  
  
“If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be?” I asked.  
  
He sniffled and rubbed his eyes. “I don’t know… I guess I’d go back to San Diego.”  
  
“Sounds nice," I nodded. "I’ve never been there though.”  
  
“You haven’t? Oh man, it’s great there.”  
  
That was the first time I ever saw him smile. It was refreshing to see that cute smile of his. At least I knew there was one thing in his life that made him happy and cheered him up. He seemed like a sweetheart, and he didn’t deserve Ruth’s mistreatment. I wished there was something I could do take him away from it all. Away from her yelling at him and causing him pain. As far as I was aware, he had no escape, and that gave me an idea.  
  
“Let’s do it, then,” I got up and pulled Eddie off the couch. “Let’s go to San Diego together.”  
  
His eyes lit up and his smile grew wider. “Really? That sounds awesome, but… what will you tell your boyfriend?”  
  
“I don’t think Layne would care.”  
  
“Oh… Do you have a job? What if your boss gets pissed?”  
  
“That’s a good question.” He got me there. But nothing was going to get in the way of my idea. “Oh well, I can explain it to my boss when we get back.”  
  
Eddie grabbed his bag and drove me to my house, where I hurriedly packed a few of my things to bring with me. I avoided making too much noise, but Layne started to wake up anyway.  
  
“I have to go away for a few days,” I gave him a kiss on his lips. “I’ll be back soon.”  
  
He sat up and got ahold of the back of my jacket, pulling me back to him. “Wait, where are you going?”  
  
“Just going away for a while. I’ll call you when I get there, alright?”  
  
“You promise?” I could tell from the look in his eyes that he didn’t want me to leave. I felt bad for leaving so suddenly, but I couldn’t explain at that moment.  
  
“I promise, Layne,” we shared one last kiss before I left.  
  
I stepped out of my house and climbed into the passenger seat of Eddie’s ‘69 Camaro, and we were on our way.  
  
“How’d you get your hands on a car this beautiful?” I asked, admiring the black, leather interior.  
  
He sighed and spoke lowly. “It used to belong to my dad.”  
  
“So he just gave it to you?”  
  
“No… not exactly.”  
  
We didn’t talk a lot after that. I spent my time listening to the music playing in the car and spacing out. I looked out the window, watching the trees, buildings, and other cars we’d pass by until I fell asleep. When Eddie woke me up that night, we were parked outside a diner.  
  
“Are you hungry?” he gently shook me awake. “If you are, whatever you get’s on me.”  
  
I was tired more than I was hungry, but getting some food wouldn’t have hurt.  
  
We sat in the back beside a window. When I wasn't looking at the menu, I was stealing glances at him. His brown hair was lovely. He had pretty, blue eyes I would have loved to get lost in if it wasn’t for the need to avoid being awkward around him. He had a very handsome face. His cheekbones and jawline were to die for. I would’ve killed to kiss his lips. I also would've killed to have his lips wrapped around my--  
  
“Chris!” Eddie’s hand hit the table with a loud bang that caught me off guard. That was when I noticed the waitress at our table, waiting for me to order something. How long was I staring at Eddie?  
  
“Oh! I’m so sorry!” I let out a forced laugh, failing to make the moment less weird. “Uh, I’ll have a burger and a Pepsi.”  
  
Well, so much for not being awkward.


	8. 8

**Eddie’s POV**  
  
After we ate and left the diner, we were back on the road. Chris told me a few times that I looked tired and should’ve found a motel or parked the car somewhere so I could sleep. He wasn't wrong. I hadn't slept in over three days. Regardless, I kept driving as we crossed the Oregon/California border. During the ride, the sky brightened into pleasant streaks of golden, blue, and pink hues. The sight of it was gratifying, bringing back the nostalgia for the days I spent living in San Diego, doing nothing but surfing without a care in the world.  
  
“Ed, you really need to get some sleep,” Chris was adamant about me continuing to drive for any longer. Sure, the thought of curling up in a soft bed-- or at the least, shutting my weary eyes --didn’t sound too bad.  
  
“I’d take your advice, you know. But what hotel lobby is gonna be open this late?”  
  
He let out a small laugh. “Don’t you mean ‘early?’”  
  
"You know what I mean," I muttered.  
  
\----------  
  
"That lady at the desk was checking you out," Chris giggled.  
  
"What? She was not."  
  
"I'm serious. You didn't see the way she smiled at you?"  
  
"No. I didn't." I was looking forward to sleeping on a comfortable bed too much to know whether the receptionist was actually dropping hints. I still didn't believe him either way.  
  
"Eddie," he sat at the foot of my bed. "We're far away from Tacoma, far away from Ruth, and most of all, getting closer to San Diego. We even have beds to sleep on at the moment. And they're fucking comfy. So why are you still glum?"  
  
"Or, maybe I couldn't care any fucking less about girls right now, Chris!"  
  
"Oh..." He looked away from me, not saying much else. That was when I started to feel like an asshole.  
  
"I'm sorry, Chris. I shouldn't have raised my voice at you."  
  
He smiled a little. "What? No, I-- I should've kept in mind that you're still upset, and that's fine."  
  
"No, it's not," I shook my head. "That's no reason for me to take things out on you. You're not the one who..."  
  
My voice trailed off. I couldn't finish my sentence, nor did I want to. If I did, I would've started crying again. That was not the time to think about what I was trying to get away from.  
  
Chris put one of his arms around me. "Hey, what's wrong?"  
  
"Uh..." I didn't want to bore Chris with any more stories, assuming he was as tired as I was. "It's nothing. I should probably get some sleep."  
  
"I see you're finally taking my advice," he joked. As he got up, I was somewhat disappointed when he released me. I felt safe and relaxed under his touch and felt like there was nothing to be afraid of.   
  
"I hope you sleep well, Eddie," he said as he got under his covers.  
  
"Thanks, you too," I yawned before doing the same.  
  
\----------  
  
 _"Yes..." Chris hissed as I took my time entering him. "Oh Eddie, I want you to fuck me so hard."  
  
His tightness made it a little difficult to move the way he wanted me to at first, so I started with slow, steady thrusts. His soft moans and his half-lidded eyes looking into mine turned me on. I came down and kissed his lips, and I felt his hands going through my hair while our kiss deepened.  
  
"Fuck," he broke the kiss to catch his breath.  
  
"Want me to go faster?" I tilted my head back, moving my hair out of my face.  
  
He nodded and cried out just before he could speak any words as I rammed into him. He looked so beautiful, his body glistening with sweat, and his hair clinging to his face. His legs were over my shoulders as I fucked him as hard as I could. That elicited a high-pitched sound I thought I'd never heard from him, which meant I hit the right spot. To our surprise, that also meant the both of us weren't alone because the bedroom door swung open.  
  
"What the-- What the actual fuck is going on here?!" There was fury in Ruth's eyes that I never saw before. Rage in her voice that I never heard before.  
  
We were out of bed in an instant, pulling our clothes back on as fast as we could.  
  
"Listen," Chris tried to calm her down. "I can expla--"  
  
"Chris, just... just shut your whore mouth, alright?" She chuckled. "I don't need to hear a thing from you."  
  
"Ruth, please," he pleaded, his deep voice getting shaky. "Just let me explain, and... why do you have a knife in your hand?"  
  
As soon as I noticed the knife in her hand, it was too late for me to react. She charged towards me, but Chris stepped in front of her, trying to fight it out of her tight grip. I wanted to get up and help him but I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to fight, and it was already too late. She headbutted him and drove the blade through his stomach, letting him fall to the floor as the life in him started to slip away. His wide eyes stared back at mine until he stopped breathing. That was the same moment a part of myself died. My best friend, the love of my life, and my reason to live was mercilessly taken from me by that monster of a woman.  
  
I didn't fight back when she grabbed me by my neck and laughed in my face. Hot tears rolled down my face and I could hear my heart beating heavily._   
  
"Eddie..."  
  
 _But it wasn't because she was going to kill me next. It seemed redundant given that Chris was dead. She already took my life away from me._    
  
"...Eddie, are you okay?"  
  
 _Then again, why not make it legit? Was a knife in the stomach as bad as it seemed?_  
  
"Eddie!"  
  
 _But it didn't have to be him who died. It should have been me._  
  
"Eddie get up!" 


	9. 9

**Chris' POV**  
  
He tossed and turned in his bed, mumbling about someone taking his life away from him. When I heard that blood-curdling scream, I had to get up.  
  
"Eddie, what's wrong?" I sat in front of him, my hands on his shoulders. "Did you have a bad dream?"  
  
He stared at me and didn't say anything. Then he put his hands over his face, muffling his quiet sobbing. It hurt me to see him like that. He didn't deserve to feel that way, and I felt there was nothing I could do to stop it.  
  
He held my hands, his thumb gently rubbing one of them. He stared down at them, biting his lip. "I had a horrible dream."   
  
"Tell me what happened."  
  
He swallowed thickly. "Y--you died."  
  
"Uh... what?"  
  
"In my dream-- or, my nightmare... um... Ruth killed you."  
  
How could someone cause another distress to the point where they affect how the other sleeps? What did Eddie do to deserve this?  
  
"Eddie..." I shook my head. "Why would Ruth kill me?"  
  
He blushed. "We-- well... she... caught us together."  
  
"You mean... like going out?"  
  
"No, we--" He stopped talking, twirling a finger through his hair.  
  
"What happened?" I leaned in a little, wanting to know more.  
  
He gulped. "We were having sex."  
  
Then it was my turn to blush. I didn't know how to respond to something like that. I sometimes imagined what that sort of thing would be like, but it didn't manifest itself in my dreams. I wasn't sure how to describe knowing that such an occurrence took place in his dream. Out of all things, why sex? Either this was a very random dream or...  
  
...he found me attractive.  
  
I wanted to ask him why this dream happened, but that sounded stupid. People couldn't control their dreams, or nightmares in that case. Otherwise, I wouldn't have died in it. But I still wondered if we had actual feelings for each other.  
  
"I know," he let out a small laugh. "That's super strange, isn't it?"  
  
"Well..." I didn't think it was strange. If anything, it was flattering, and kind of hot.  
  
"I don't know if I want to go back to sleep, Chris. I'm still scared."  
  
"You've got to sleep. Who knows how long you've been up?"  
  
He scratched his head. "I... haven't had any real sleep in three days."  
  
"Oh no, you really need to go back to sleep. You shouldn't drive while you're tired anyway."  
  
"You're right, but..." he paused. "...I don't want to be alone."  
  
"But you're not. I'm right here, Eddie. I'll always be here for you."  
  
"That means so much, Chris. Really, I don't know what to say, but I appreciate that a lot." That cute smile made me want to kiss him so badly. I couldn't help but wonder if his lips felt as soft as they looked.  
  
When I started to get off the bed, he reached out, holding my wrist. There was a disappointed, pleading look in his eyes. Not only that, but the way he was holding onto me was enough to lead me to assume what he wanted.  
  
"Uh... did you want me to stay in the bed with you, or...?"  
  
He stared at me before giving a reluctant nod. "I'd... feel much safer with you close to me. If that's not weird to you or anything."  
  
"No, it's not. If I can help you, then I will," I assured him. "Plus, it's just the two of us here. So there isn't anything for you to worry about."  
  
He yawned. "Yeah but... I can't help but worry. I'm always worried."  
  
"You don't have to worry about a thing as long as you're with me." I got under the covers beside him, and he moved closer to me. His put his arms around me and rested his head against my chest.  
  
"I love you, Chris," he sighed.  
  
I couldn't believe my ears. Did he mean to say that? No one would say that unintentionally, so he must've had feelings for me.  
  
"...what did you just say?"  
  
There was no answer. He fell asleep. 


	10. 10

**Eddie's POV**  
  
I woke up to the smell of hot coffee. I changed my clothes and went to the small kitchen area to see Chris pouring sugar into a mug.  
  
"You're gonna get diabetes with that much sugar," I joked.  
  
He cursed loudly and knocked the bag of sugar onto the floor. "You scared the shit out of me!"  
  
"I'm so sorry, Chris! Let me clean that up."  
  
He stepped in front of me, his hands on my shoulders. "Don't worry about it, Eddie. It's fine." He started laughing. I was relieved to see that, as I was afraid I pissed him off. People rarely broke into laughter after being scared. "That reminds me of a hilarious story you need to hear. Come, sit down and eat. Want any coffee?"  
  
"Yeah, sure." There was a hot plate of bacon, eggs, and toast in front of me. I thought about how wonderful it smelled until I did a double-take towards the window. It was pitch black outside. No lights, no stars. "I have to say, this is the first time I've had breakfast food at midnight."  
  
"It's never too late to try new things." Chris snickered at his own pun as he swept sugar off the floor.  
  
\----------  
  
"...And that's the story of how I almost fell off a four-story balcony on Halloween three years ago."  
  
Despite Chris nearly dying, I couldn't hold in my laughter. I was tearing up and my face started to hurt. I had to put my head down on the table in hopes of getting myself together.  
  
I sat up and took a deep breath. "God, I haven't laughed that hard in a very long time."  
  
"I'm glad my near-death experience brought a smile to your face," he laughed before taking a sip of his coffee.  
  
"Moral of the story: Don't bump into Jerry in a Skeletor costume anywhere, let alone a balcony." I finished the last of my coffee before it got too cold. "You know, with a story like that, how come I'm the one having nightmares?"  
  
He stared blankly into space before answering me. "You mean... that wasn't your first nightmare?"  
  
I shook my head. "No, but that was the worst of them."  
  
He put his hand over mine. "Did you sleep alright?"  
  
"Yeah, I slept fine. Thank you. For, um... helping, I mean."  
  
I looked at him, but he wasn't looking back at me. He was facing the window. It looked like something was on his mind, and I didn't know what.  
  
"What are you thinking about?"  
  
He was quiet and didn't break his gaze. "Layne."  
  
"Oh..." I had forgotten all about everyone else back in Washington. I even forgot Chris was in a relationship already. Did he know about our sudden road trip? If so, it must have upset him, make him suspect that Chris would cheat on him with me. I didn't think Chris would be unfaithful to him like that. They seemed to love each other very much, from what I saw. They always smiled in each other's company, often affectionate towards one another. Everything seemed perfect for them. They had the relationship Ruth and I used to have before everything went shitty.  
  
"You should call him," I suggested.  
  
"What do I even tell him?"  
  
I scratched my head. "You... could tell him the truth."  
  
"Which is what?"  
  
"We're going to San Diego together."  
  
"Because...?"  
  
I was stumped. What  _were_  we going to tell him? It was the truth, and there was nothing more to it. But it was bound to cause some trouble without a doubt.  
  
He got up from the kitchen table. "Never mind, I have an idea."  
  
"And what's that?"  
  
He cleaned our dishes off the table and walked away. "I'm not sure, but I'll sort it out." 


	11. 11

**Chris' POV**  
  
I didn't think ahead about what I would say to him. I chose to wing it instead and see if I could talk Eddie and me out of a potential situation.  
  
It took a moment before Layne answered the phone.  
  
"Hey, babe," I said. "How are--"  
  
 _"Chris? Is that you?"_  he asked, sounding like he had just woken up.  _"Oh my god, I miss you! Where are you?"_  
  
It didn't take long for it to become harder than I thought it would be. I took a deep breath. "I... have been around."  
  
 _"Around where?"_  
  
"Here... there... uhh..." What was I doing? Why was I such a moron to think this was a good idea?  
  
 _"I'll be honest, I was a little worried when you left so suddenly... Is everything okay?"_  
  
"Ehh..." I didn't have a straightforward answer for that.  
  
 _"What's the matter, baby? You can talk to me about it. I'm right here."_  
  
"...Do you love me, Layne?" I asked out of the blue.  
  
 _"Chris, of course, I love you. You mean the world to me and you know that."_  
  
"I know you do. And I love you too," I lay down on my bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking about how much I started to miss him. "But more often than not, I feel like I don't love you as much as you deserve."  
  
 _"Chris, come on,"_  he whined.  _"Don't be like that. Don't you dare say you aren't good enough for me because you're perfect."_  
  
I bit my lip, a smile still tugging my lips. "You're perfect."  
  
 _"You're so sweet, Chris,"_  he giggled.  _"I'm glad you called me, even if it is the middle of the night."_  
  
"I promised I'd call you, didn't it? Plus, I... I'm just glad to hear your voice again."  
  
 _"Aww. And I'm glad I got to hear your sexy voice again, babe."_  
  
"Well, uh... I'll let you go back to sleep now, Layne. I'll talk to you soon. I love you."  
  
He yawned.  _"I love you too, Chris. Take care."_  
  
As we both hung up, Eddie came into the room. "Well?"  
  
"Well, I guess we're safe," I presumed.  
  
"...You guess?"  
  
"I pushed some buttons to see where things would go, really." I put the phone back on the nightstand beside me and lay back down.  
  
"So I've heard," he leaned against the door frame. "Anyways, I think we should get back on the road."  
  
"Sounds like a good idea, but let me take a shower first." I got up and took my towel out of my bag.  
  
"Take your time," he took his keys from the dresser. "I'm gonna go get cigarettes. Want anything?"  
  
"No thanks."  
  
"Suit yourself," he said before closing the door. 


	12. 12

**Eddie's POV**  
  
"Where in the world is my lighter?" I muttered to myself as I returned. Did I give it to Chris at some point? Did I even bring one with me? "Hey, Chris!" I called out. "Do you have--"  
  
I had lost my train of thought thanks to Chris' naked body in front of me. I didn't even try to take my eyes off him. His body was perfect, like a Greek sculpture. The way it glistened turned me on a bit. When we made eye contact, that was when I noticed that he shaved. Somehow, he looked like a completely different man, but he was still the same hot guy he was before I left the room. In my mind, I was freaking out. Neither of us broke eye contact, and he wasn't in any sort of hurry to cover up. In fact, he didn't move at all. He stood in front of me with his arms crossed, calmly looking at me.  
  
"Enjoying the view?" he asked. I assumed that was rhetorical because of course I enjoyed it. He looked amazing. "I'm willing to bet you're thinking... improper thoughts, from the looks of things."  
  
As soon as I thought the moment couldn't get any more awkward, he noticed my erection. It didn't seem right. My whole life, I only found myself attracted to other women. Chris was obviously not a woman, yet I had a dream of the both of us having sex, and I got hard looking at him. It felt wrong because he was in a relationship already. But at the same time, it felt right because he treated me better than my supposed girlfriend should have.  
  
"Come here for a second," he said. I got closer to him with some reluctance. Then I froze in place as he kissed my lips. He looked at me with a smirk on his face, waiting for me to react. I wanted to kiss him back, but it would have been wrong of me to do. He was dating Layne, and I considered him a friend to some extent. We didn't talk or hang out often, but he and I were on good terms. I didn't want to ruin that by betraying him.  
  
Then Chris kissed me again, and for whatever reason, I kissed him back this time. My hands gently held his bare hips as it deepened. I wasn't sure what we were doing. I wasn't sure what  _I_  was doing. The thought of it being wrong wouldn't leave my mind, yet it felt so right.  
  
He started to pull my shirt off, and that was when I panicked and stepped away from him. I stared at the floor, unsure of how to explain what I just did because I didn't know either. When I looked up, I noticed my lighter on the bed. I picked it up as I went onto the balcony to have a smoke. 


	13. 13

**Chris' POV**  
  
I felt like shit because of what I did to Eddie. I never wanted to make him uncomfortable. I didn't realize it until he pulled away from me and stormed out the room.  
  
Four hours passed and we still didn't speak to each other in the car. He didn't look upset, but he wouldn't say anything to me. I was certain that something was on his mind, and I wish he told me. The silence was killing me. It was worse than the thought of him being outward about whatever anger he may have had towards me. So I tried to break the silence.  
  
"I'm sorry about what happened earlier."  
  
The heavy sigh he let out worried me.  
  
"You didn't do anything. Why are you apologizing?"  
  
"For kissing you, and..." I tried to think of a way to rephrase the next part.  
  
"Oh, that?" he took a drag from his cigarette. "Look, it's nothing--"  
  
"It's not. It's not nothing, Ed. I tried to have sex with you, and you weren't comfortable with that. So I'm sorry."  
  
"Yeah, well..." he trailed off, taking another drag.  
  
"What?"  
  
He didn't answer me and kept driving with his eyes on the road. The spontaneous silent treatments were beginning to annoy me. I looked out the window in boredom. It was the first time I went to California, and the first time I saw the kind of environment it had to offer. Towering palm trees, sandy shorelines, and all.  
  
"Did you mean those things you said to Layne?" Eddie's question drove my attention away from the scenery. It came out of nowhere. But because he was so quiet, he might have intended to bring it up.   
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"You said you didn't think you loved him as much as he deserved. Did you mean that?"  
  
"So you really did hear our conversation," I replied.  
  
"Sorry, I couldn't help it. You two are cute together."  
  
I smiled. "Jeez, well... thank you."  
  
We didn't say anything else for a while, so I turned up the Metallica song that was playing on the radio.  
  
"You like this band?" Eddie asked.  
  
I shrugged. "They're alright. Everyone else seems to either love or hate them."  
  
"Mmm... I usually don't have time to listen to music."  
  
"You must be really busy all the time then."  
  
His eyebrows furrowed. "Uh... yeah. I guess you could call it that."  
  
As I noticed he looked upset, I remembered his relationship with his girlfriend.  
  
"What, did she prohibit any access to the outside world or something?"  
  
He turned towards me with an expression that made me feel like he wanted to punch me. I hated pissing him off, and never intended to. All I wanted to do was help him, but all I did, for the most part, was either make him uncomfortable or make him mad. Before I could apologize, he cut me off.  
  
"No, don't do that, Chris."  
  
"Don't do what? Say I'm sorry?"  
  
"You didn't do anything wrong," he told me. "Besides, I'm not mad at you. I know it may seem that way, but trust me." He paused as he put his cigarette to his lips, inhaling and exhaling slowly. "And I don't know if I told you this already. but I really appreciate you. I wish I always had someone like you in my life."  
  
"Eddie..." I would have given him a hug if I could. Instead, he gave me a kiss on my cheek and it made my heart melt, and left me blushing, smiling, and speechless. 


	14. 14

**Eddie's POV  
 _Two years ago_**  
  
"Hey! The birthday boy is here!" Jerry announced as I returned home. There were balloons everywhere, and a cake on the kitchen counter.  
  
Ruth came to me and gave me a tight hug.   
  
"Happy Birthday, Eddie!" She said before giving me a kiss.  
  
A smile crept across my lips as I looked around the room. I wasn't expecting any of this, let alone for anyone to acknowledge my birthday. Even if it was only the three of us, I still appreciated it and didn't want anything more. "I-- I really don't know what to say."  
  
"A 'thank you' would be nice," Jerry jested as he handed me a beer. "So, what's the plan, birthday boy?"  
  
"Is there anything you want to do, Eddie?" Ruth asked. "Any place you want to go?"  
  
Nothing in particular came to mind. "Nah, I can't think of anything. Except... maybe going to a bar, I guess."  
  
They both thought it was a good idea. Jerry mentioned that he planned on meeting his friend Layne there. It was a bit too cold to walk there, so we took Jerry's car.  
  
When we got there, a man sitting in the back booth waved to us. It must've been who Jerry meant to meet up with, so we joined him.  
  
While the three of them caught up and whatnot, I stayed quiet and drank my beer. I was sometimes afraid of talking to strangers and incapable of joining conversations. I wasn't sure why I chose to go to places like bars if I wasn't going to talk to anyone in the first place.   
  
My thoughts were interrupted when a hand gently touched mine.  
  
"Is everything okay?" the man across from me asked.  
  
"Uh... yeah, I guess so." I took a good look at him for the first time. His wavy, blonde hair was just above his shoulders, and he had big, blue eyes.  
  
"My name's Layne," he said with a sweet smile.  
  
Before I could tell him my name, Ruth sat beside me and pulled me by my shirt for a kiss.  
  
"I didn't know the both of you were going out," he giggled.  
  
"This is Eddie. We've been dating for a few months." She took a gulp of the fancy alcoholic drink she had in her hand. I was certain that I was in for an uncomfortable evening then. "Oh! And it's his birthday."  
  
"Aww, well happy birthday, Eddie," he said as he got up. "I'll be back. I'm going to the bathroom."  
  
As he left, she caught me by surprise with a deeper kiss. There was a strong taste of the drink she had on her tongue. I didn't kiss her back, but she wouldn't stop. She started kissing my neck, and I tried to gently push her off me.  
  
"We shouldn't do this here," I told her.  
  
She didn't stop. She moved her hand under my shirt as she kept sucking and kissing my neck. When she bit me, I cursed and pushed her off me.  
  
"Don't be such a prude, Eddie." She spoke slowly as she caressed my leg. "You know you want it."  
  
"I don't," I said firmly and moved her hand away. "Not right now. Especially not in public. Please... just stop."  
  
She sat on my lap and gave me a long, lingering kiss as she tried to put my hands on her ass.  
  
"Will you fucking stop?!" I pushed her off me again and walked away. That night wasn't the first time she got drunk, but she never forced herself onto me before. Her drunk shenanigans were anything but new. I didn't know why I bothered to attempt tolerating them. I was a few years younger than her, yet I always felt like her babysitter when she was too drunk to do anything rational or mature.  
  
I saw Layne at the bar, talking to one of the bartenders. I sat next to him, and he turned towards me.  
  
"Are you enjoying your birthday?"  
  
I sighed. "No. Not at the moment."  
  
He finished the last of his drink and put on his jacket. "Come with me."  
  
I had nothing better to do, and I wanted to get away from Ruth for a while, so I followed him.  
  
\----------  
  
I let out a low groan as Layne went down on me. His tongue swirled around the tip of my member before taking me into his mouth.  
  
"I had too much to drink too, didn't I?" I laughed. I couldn't recall what led to me being naked and him sucking me off in his bedroom. I remembered leaving the bar and entering his house, but that was all.  
  
With a soft pop, he stopped. "Well, at least you have the decency to do it in a private area." He looked up at me as he gave my length slow, teasing strokes. "And the fact that this is coming from a slut like me is really saying something."  
  
"You're not a slut." I shut my eyes and licked my lips.  
  
"You're only saying that because we just met."  
  
"Hmm? No... no, I'm not. Layne... you aren't a slut, alright?"  
  
"Trust me," he continued to pleasure me with gentle strokes. "You'll change your mind by the time we're done here." He stood up in front of me and took his clothes off piece by piece, revealing his cute, slim body. He went to his dresser and came back to the bed with a bottle in his hand. He poured a bit into the other hand before lathering me with the cool liquid. "Have you fucked a guy before?"  
  
I shook my head.  
  
"Ah. Well, it's not all that different from fucking a girl, I think." He put the bottle on the floor and got on top of me. He moaned softly into my mouth as we kissed. My hands trailed down his back and cupped his ass. He then broke the kiss as he pushed me inside him. "I never thought I'd meet you and get to ride your cock during the same night." he barely bit back a moan as he took in every inch of me.  
  
The sound of the both of us breathing heavily and moaning filled the room, along with the bed creaking slightly to his every move. I put my hands on his hips, wanting him to go faster, and he did so eagerly.  
  
"Mmm... you like that, don't you?"  
  
"Y--yes," I hissed. He felt so hot and tight, I thought I would come at any moment.  
  
"By the way, you're not gonna come until I do," Layne told me. It was as if he read my mind. Oh well. After all, I didn't want it all to end yet.  
  
He leaned down and kissed my neck, moving his way up before lightly grazing my earlobe with his teeth. That and his breath against my skin turned me on. His hands were on my shoulders as he moved faster. "Do you wanna fuck me?"  
  
I nodded, and he slowed down to a stop. I got up as he lay down on his back. I took my time entering him again, to which he let out a lustful sigh.   
  
"God, you're sexy," he purred. "You're so fucking sexy, Eddie." His eyes closed to slits as I thrust into him in a slow rhythm.  
  
"Want me to go deeper?" I asked him.  
  
"You can do whatever you want to me, birthday boy. As long as I come first."  
  
He moaned louder as I pushed deeper into him. He used one of his hands to stroke himself while the other gripped my ass. I thrust into him in a faster rhythm as he begged me to. He let out small whines every time I made contact with a spot he said felt good to him. It didn't take long for him to reach his climax at that rate. He shouted my name between heavy breaths as he came all over himself.  
  
He sat up as I pulled out, and he took me into his mouth again. While he moved faster, I let out broken moans as I released myself inside him. He swallowed, licked his lips, and looked up at me when he finished.  
  
"Are you convinced yet?" he smirked.  
  
"You're not a slut."  
  
He shook his head and laughed as he got up. "You won't tell anyone about this will you?"  
  
My girlfriend instantly came to mind, and I felt a lump in my throat. "Y--yeah. I won't tell anyone if you won't."  
  
"I won't. I promise, baby," he gave me a kiss on my lips before walking away. "Wanna take a shower?"  
  
I nodded and followed him into the shower. I couldn't believe what I had done. If it wasn't for the alcohol, I wouldn't have cheated on Ruth. I criticized her for being drunk and trying to have sex with me, only to do the same with Layne right after. If that wasn't hypocrisy, then what was?  
  
\----------  
  
I took a deep breath as I entered the quiet apartment. It was well after midnight, and Ruth was asleep. I felt even more guilty about what I did as I got into bed beside her. I did something shitty and unfair to her. I was unfaithful to her. I cheated on someone that I loved. Even though there were some moments and habits of hers I didn't care for, I still loved Ruth.   
  
At least, that was what I thought. 


	15. 15

**Chris' POV**  
  
"Eddie...?" I rubbed my eyes as I woke up. I looked to my left and he wasn't beside me. The car was parked near a beach, so I got out the car and started looking for him there.  
  
It didn't take long for me to find him, and he wasn't too far away from me. He was sitting on a rock next to the shore. As I got closer to him, he looked my way.  
  
"This is beautiful, isn't it?" I sat beside him and looked at the starry sky with him. He didn't say anything for a while, and when I looked at him, he was wiping his eyes with his sleeve. "Eddie, are you crying?"  
  
"I'm supposed to be enjoying myself here," he swallowed thickly and moved his hair from in front of his face. "Yet I'm still crying and feeling like shit."  
  
"What's wrong, Eddie?" I tried putting my arm around him but he moved it away.  
  
"I don't... think it's okay for me to tell you."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"I promised someone that I wouldn't."  
  
"Oh..." It was discouraging that he wouldn't tell me what was wrong. I couldn't help him if I didn't know what was troubling him. But a promise was a promise.  
  
"How long have you been with Layne?"  
  
"Oh, uh... almost a year. Why?"  
  
He took a deep breath. "If I tell you, you have to swear not to tell anyone. At all."  
  
Assuming the secret involved Layne, I got even more curious. "I won't tell anyone. I promise."  
  
His eyes darted back and forth from me to his fumbling hands. His bottom lip trembled and he inhaled sharply. "A couple years ago, I-- I slept with Layne."  
  
I still didn't get what was upsetting him, but as soon as it hit me, he said exactly what I was thinking.  
  
"Chris... I cheated on Ruth."  
  
"You... you did?"  
  
He explained why it happened, yet I still couldn't wrap my head around it. Cheating didn't sound like something he would do, even if he was drunk.  
  
"This is stupid," he buried his face in his knees. "I'm so fucking stupid."  
  
"I'm sure it was only a mistake."  
  
I put my arm around him as he rested his head against my shoulder. "I'm no better than her. I'm no fucking better than her. I'm just as awful as her."  
  
"No, you're not."  
  
"Yes I fucking am, Chris!" he snapped.  
  
"Really? Because if I remember correctly, you aren't the one constantly treating her like she's subhuman."  
  
"Okay, but--"  
  
"Are you the one degrading her in public?"  
  
"N--no, but Chris--"  
  
"Are you the one who put your hands on her?"  
  
"Chris..." he sniffled. "Chris, you don't get it-"  
  
"No,  _you_  don't fucking get it." I raised my voice. "Neither of you are innocent, but what you did is nothing compared to the pain she's caused you. I might not know about everything she's ever done to you, but I've been around you long enough to know that."  
  
He went silent as he stared at me. He opened his mouth to speak, but he shook his head and covered his face.  
  
I moved his hands from his face, holding them gently. "I knew something was wrong... when I visited you the other day. You looked petrified and hurt. Not only physically hurt, but... emotionally and mentally too. I could see it in your eyes. No one deserves to go through shit like that. You don't deserve it either."  
  
He wrapped his arms around me, and I did the same to him. We sat locked in each other's embrace until he let go.  
  
"What did I do in my past life to deserve someone wonderful like you?" his low, quiet voice spoke. "You're perfect."  
  
"You don't mean that," I said firmly.  
  
"I do mean it, Chris. Really. Everything about you is perfect."  
  
"I'm not perfect, Eddie. Nothing about me or my life is perfect."  
  
His eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean? You're an amazing person. You're considerate, intelligent, thoughtful, you're... you're amazing, Chris! I don't even know how to describe it."  
  
I knew he meant what he said, but I didn't agree with him. I wasn't a perfect person with a perfect life like he thought I was. I was far from it.  
  
I sighed, smiling slightly. "Thank you, Eddie. It means a lot to hear you say those things."  
  
"You're welcome. It... just seemed like you didn't believe me or something."  
  
"I mean... I'm not in disbelief so much as I disagree with you. That's all."  
  
He looked confused again. "But... why?"  
  
"Why? Because I'm not a perfect person. I'm not the person most people think I am. I'm nothing special. I'm just another guy, with my own life and my own problems. I just... try to help people with theirs so I can forget about my own. Seems like making other people happy is the closest I can get to being happy myself."   
  
I took a cigarette from Eddie's carton and he lit it for me. I took a long drag before I resumed. "Like, just because I look like a carefree beach-goer all the fucking time, it doesn't mean I feel like one. You know? And most of the time, it doesn't work. I try to make other people happy, but sometimes what I'm doing isn't good enough. Sometimes I'm not good enough."  
  
I felt a lump in my throat during my last sentence. I swallowed to make the feeling go away, but the more I thought about not wanting to cry, the harder it got to prevent it.  
  
Eddie put his arms around me as his soft, cool lips pressed against mine. Our kiss was deep but slow as we tasted each other. He pulled away, biting his lip as he looked at me. We seemed to have the exact thing in mind when we both ran back into the car, giggling in excitement.   
  
He peeled out of the parking lot and drove to the nearest motel.


	16. 16

**Eddie's POV**  
  
The more time I spent with Chris, the more I fell in love with him. He could say whatever he wanted about himself because I still thought he was perfect. He was everything I could ever want in a person. He was funny, sweet, and insanely good-looking. But what I loved the most about him was that he was comforting. It was like he went out of his way to make me feel safe. I wished there was some way I could express how much I appreciated him.  
  
"I love you," I broke our kiss to catch my breath.  
  
He opened his eyes, and he looked at me as if he couldn't believe what I said. "I love you too."  
  
"I feel like I should've known all along that at least one person loves me."  
  
He sat up, stretching his arms as he yawned. "With cheekbones like yours, who wouldn't fall in love with you?"  
  
I felt myself blush when he said that. I never saw myself as good-looking. I kept telling myself I was average at best. I didn't react that well to compliments, people flirting with me, or asking me out.  
  
"Usually, I'd be in disbelief hearing this come from you of all people." I looked up at the objectively attractive man in front of me.  
  
"Well..." he lay down on his back, staring at the ceiling. "I'm not lying to you."  
  
"It's not that. I guess I don't have very high self-esteem."  
  
"What? But... you're fucking beautiful!"  
  
There was something about being called beautiful that made me feel a way I never felt before. It was different compared to being called cute, handsome, hot, or anything else. When someone called another beautiful, you could always tell they meant it. If anything, knowing that Chris meant what he said meant more to me than anything else.  
  
He got off the bed and stood in front me.  
  
"What are you looking at?" I asked him, as I couldn't tell what he was staring down at. It then became clear to me as he unbuttoned my shorts and pulled them down to my ankles. He did the same to my boxers as well, freeing my erection.  
  
"Chris, what are you doing? Wh--" my thoughts came to a complete halt as he gave my cock a long, slow lick before taking it into his mouth.  
  
"Oh, god..." I sighed as his mouth engulfed me. The wetness and warmth moving against me were enough to make me come, and it didn't take that long for me to do so.   
  
I groaned his name as I erupted, releasing my come into his mouth. He moaned as he swallowed every last drop, then looked at me and smiled when he finished.  
  
"So... now what?" I asked him.  
  
"Now, you put your clothes back on and tell no one about this."  
  
I got up to do what he told me. "We're going to hell for this, aren't we?"  
  
"I don't know about you, but I already have a spot reserved for myself," he laughed.  
  
"You should really consider becoming a comedian, Chris." I shook my head and smiled.


	17. 17

**Chris' POV**  
  
"So, now what?"  
  
"What?" His eyebrows went up as he looked at me.  
  
"Like, what do we do now? Where do we go?"  
  
He drank the last of his coffee. "You think we should head home?"  
  
"Probably." I wasn't too thrilled about going home. I missed Layne a lot, but I loved how things were with just Eddie and I. I was happy. Most of all, Eddie was happy. He needed to get away from Ruth and collect himself. Sure, there were moments where he got upset or cried, but he needed to let it all out. It was better than keeping his feelings bottled up. It hurt me to see him cry, it was necessary. I wanted to help him. I wanted him to clear his head while he was here with me.  
  
"Alright, let's get our stuff and go home."  
  
We left the diner and returned to the motel to pack our things. We rode from San Diego back to Tacoma in nearly a day. The ride back was faster than it did when we left Washington. We didn't make as many stops, and any stops we made were urgent but short.  
  
Eddie and I didn't talk as much on our way back. This gave me enough time to plan out how I'd explain my sudden trip to Layne. I also thought about what would become of Eddie and me when we got home. I had no idea if we would start a relationship, stay as friends, hook up in secret, or what. I had feelings for him, but I was dating Layne, who I also loved and had feelings for.  
  
If I broke up with Layne, it would hurt him to an extent I knew I wasn't ready to handle. Everything was perfect between us, and I didn't want to ruin it. We were nearing our two-year anniversary, which made it all harder for me.  
  
If I stopped seeing Eddie, that would hurt him too. Worst of all, so would Ruth, I assumed. What if choosing Layne would make him want nothing to do with me? I wouldn't be able to protect him anymore. He wouldn't try to make peace with his ex, but that didn't mean he was safe. And whether I chose him or not, he wouldn't have anywhere to stay, as far as I knew.  
  
I loved them both too much to pick one. I hated the idea of hurting either of them, but I couldn't avoid it.  
  
"You okay, Chris?" Eddie's voice brought me back to reality. I took a look around and noticed we were parked outside my house. I had to make a decision, and fast.  
  
I ran my hands through my hair, thinking of what to say. "I-- I don't know what to do."  
  
He reached out, gently resting his hand on my shoulder. "Chris, what's going on? What's wrong?"  
  
"I don't know what to do!" My voice got a little louder. "I just-- I don't know."  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"About you! And-- and Layne."  
  
He was about to say something but he didn't speak. All he did was stare at me. I was sure he understood what I was trying to say then.  
  
"Well... I mean... you don't really have to pick between me or him. You're already dating Layne."  
  
"Yeah, but..." Or maybe he didn't understand. "But I love you too. And I want to protect you."  
  
"Oh, that's what this is about?" He sounded annoyed. "I'll be fine, Chris. I can handle myself from here."  
  
"Do you even know where you're going after this?"  
  
He sighed. "Other than going back to the apartment and getting the last bit of my things--"  
  
"No, no, no... you can't go back there. What if Ruth is still there?"  
  
Neither of us were prepared to handle seeing her again. She and I used to be very close, but I no longer considered her a friend after what I heard about her from Eddie. But what was more important was that he didn't want to see her again. I knew she hurt him in more ways than I was aware of, and I wanted to do everything I could to make sure it didn't happen again.  
  
"I think we should at least check first to make sure she's not there."  
  
"You're right," he said in a soft tone.  
  
When we got there, we didn't see her car anywhere. We wanted to be sure that she wasn't anywhere in sight, so we went to his floor and entered the apartment with caution.


	18. 18

**Eddie's POV**  
  
When I opened the door, Ruth wasn't anywhere in sight. I waited a few seconds before walking in. Everything looked normal so far until I reached the bedroom. Her clothes weren't in the closet or dresser anymore. Her pictures, jewelry, and everything else that belonged to her was gone.  
  
"Looks like she's gone," I closed the last drawer I looked in.  
  
"What if she's trying to trick you?" Chris leaned against the door frame.  
  
He wasn't wrong since lies and mind games were right up her alley.  
  
Two boxes of CDs and my surfboard were all we took with us. I left many things behind in the apartment because I either didn't want it or couldn't take it with me. And they didn't feel like they were truly mine anymore since everything reminded me of Ruth. Every piece of clothing, every trinket, every wilting flower... the apartment itself made me think of her. The unconditional love I had for her, and the things she did to me that made it go away. The way it dwindled down to nonexistence.  
  
Considering how things were at the moment, I would never see or hear from her again. We both took our things and went our separate ways, as far as I was concerned. All there was left to do was hope I'd never see her again.  
  
We stopped at Chris' place again, and I was about to leave until he turned around and came back to the car.   
  
"You should come inside for a bit. I'm sure Layne would want to say hi to you."  
  
There wasn't any reason for me to decline, so I followed him inside. We entered the living room to find Layne and Sean sitting on the couch. Sean waved at us and redirected his attention back to the TV.   
  
"Chris!" You're back!" Layne set aside the book he was reading and came to Chris, wrapping his arms around him. "I missed you, baby."  
  
When they released one another and Layne stepped away from him, he noticed me standing behind Chris. The joyous look on his face changed to a worried one, his eyes unwidened and his lips formed a slight pout.   
  
"Eddie..." his voice was soft. "Oh my god, where have you been?" He gave me a tight hug.  
  
"I don't know," I muttered. I wasn't going to tell him where I really was or who I was with, and I hoped Chris wouldn't either.  
  
He moved some of my hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear. "Are you alright?"  
  
"I'm okay, I guess. Why?"  
  
He sighed. "Because I... heard about what happened a few days ago. Between you and Ruth."  
  
"She told you..." I tried not to sound angry. I was willing to bet she told all her friends about it in a way that made her seem like the victim.  
  
"What did she tell you?" Chris asked him.  
  
"All she said was that she and Eddie yelled at each other. Then she pushed him and slapped him."  
  
"That's it?"  
  
"That, and she said she didn't mean to do that. She said she was sorry."  
  
"She's full of shit," I shook my head. "You didn't actually believe her, did you, Layne?"  
  
"Whether she's sincere or trying to save face isn't important to me. What's important to me is that she doesn't hurt you anymore."  
  
I didn't know what else to say, but I appreciated hearing that from him.  
  
"I don't know what to do, you guys. At this point, all of this should be over, but I feel like I'm far from that."  
  
"Why don't you come sit down?" Layne led me to the living room, and we sat down on the couch. "You got all your things out of that apartment, right?"  
  
I nodded.  
  
"Do you have a place to stay?"  
  
"I don't." Finding a place to move into was the only other thing I had left to do. "I don't know. I'll just stay in a hotel or something until I straighten this out."  
  
I forgot Sean was even in the room until he chimed in. "You could stay with me if you want."  
  
"Oh! Um... wow." It meant a lot to me that Sean offered to let me move in with him. "Thank you, but, are you sure you're alright with that?"  
  
"There's more than enough room for you in my new place. Don't worry about it."  
  
"Sean, you moved?" Layne asked him.  
  
"It's a long story for another time, but..." he drank some of his beer and wiped his mouth. "Anyway, Eddie can stay as long as he needs to."  
  
I didn't know what to say. My eyes darted around the room until I saw Chris, who briefly tilted his head to the side. I took it as a gesture to meet him outside.  
  
"I'll think about it." I got up from the couch and stepped out on the porch.   
  
As a lit a cigarette, I felt his arms around me as he rested his chin on my shoulder.  
  
"You still love him, don't you?" The cigarette smoke left my lips as I spoke.  
  
I loved Chris, but I didn't want to ruin his relationship with Layne. If he chose him over me, it wouldn't bother me much. He deserved to be happy, even if he wasn't dating me. It would be difficult to admit, but it had to be done.  
  
I turned around and faced him when he let go of me. He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his black jacket.  
  
"I do love Layne. I love him so much. I… I really don't know what to do."  
  
"Then stay with him."  
  
"But, at the same time, I love you."  
  
"I love you too, Chris. But I think you should stay with Layne."  
  
As much as it hurt to say the last sentence, it needed to be said.   
  
“W-why are you saying it like that? Do you not want me?”  
  
I groaned. “Oh my god, Chris. I love you, and I do want you. But what I want isn’t important right now.”  
  
“Is everything okay?” Layne came to the porch. “What are you guys talking about?”  
  
Neither of us said anything. If Layne heard even a sentence from our conversation, we were certainly fucked.  
  
Chris ran a hand through his hair. “I’ll probably have to look for a new job soon. That’s all.”  
  
“Oh! Speaking of which, I do need to talk to you.” Layne grabbed his wrist and pulled him inside.  
  
I finished my cigarette and went back inside, thankful that Chris once again evaded the start of a large problem.


	19. 19

**Chris’ POV**  
  
Layne brought me upstairs to our bedroom to tell me I was pretty much fired from my job. My boss called yesterday, telling him he found someone else to replace me. I said it was no big deal. We had enough money to keep a roof over our heads until I found another job, which shouldn’t have been too difficult to do.  
  
“Chris, what are we going to do?” He sat beside me on the bed.  
  
“Trust me, we’re fine.”  
  
“A-are you sure?”  
  
I kissed his forehead. “I’m sure, Layne. You trust me, don’t you?”  
  
He gave a shy nod and a small smile. “I do, Chris. I love you.”  
  
My hand ran through his blonde curls, and I swallowed before I spoke. “I love you too.”  
  
“I missed you so much,” he sat on my lap and kissed my face, working his way down to my neck as I lay down on the bed.  
  
“I missed you, Layne.” I didn’t move a muscle.  
  
“Where did you go?” He took my jacket and shirt off, tossing them to the floor.  
  
“...I went to California.”  
  
“Tell me more,” he moaned, now kissing one of my nipples.  
  
“Umm… it was just some family drama. It turned out to be a waste of time. Nothing interest--”  
  
I hissed and bit my lip, groaning as he tugged at it with his teeth. I was getting hard, but I wasn’t in the mood for sex. I was always in the mood to do it with Layne, but this wasn’t one of those times. Something was off, but I couldn’t put my finger on it.  
  
“Know what else I missed?” he purred as he sat up.  
  
“What?”  
  
“This.” He undid my belt and pants. He pulled them down and took my cock into his hand through the fabric of my boxers. Why wasn’t I surprised? I bet it was all he bothered to think about.  
  
In spite of that, I still didn’t get up. I didn’t tell him to stop either, leaving him to go down on me as he pleased.


	20. 20

**Eddie’s POV**  
  
I hadn’t heard from Chris in over two months. I grew worried about him at first. Worried about us. Then I came to terms with him choosing Layne over me for good. As long as he was happy, then I didn’t care. At the same time, a part of me wished he chose me. That part of me made me regret not begging him to be with me. I loved him. I needed him more than I wanted him, but I pushed him away again.  
  
I was in the laundry room folding clothes when the telephone in the kitchen rang. I figured the call wasn’t for me, so I ignored it. I went to the phone and answered it when it rang a second time.  
  
 _“Hey Sean, is Eddie there?”_  
  
My heart was racing when I heard Chris’ voice. There were so many things I wanted to tell him, I didn’t know what to say first. But I told myself that it all could wait because I was certain he had something more important to say.  
  
“Hi, Chris. Sean’s not--”  
  
He gasped.  _“Eddie? Is that you?”_  
  
“Yeah, it’s me. What’s going on?”  
  
 _“...quite a lot. It’s a long story.”_  
  
“Do you want to swing by and talk?”  
  
 _“Sure, I’ll be there in a few.”_  
  
\----------  
  
“Jesus Christ, why don’t you have an umbrella?” I let Chris inside and out of the pouring rain.  
  
“Didn’t think I needed one. I drove here.”  
  
“You look like you walked here,” I led him upstairs to my room. “We need to get you some dry clothes. Come on.”  
  
“You don’t have to do that, Eddie.”  
  
“Would you rather shake yourself dry like a dog?”  
  
He let out a small laugh. “I never thought of that.”  
  
I led him to the bathroom so he could undress and take a hot bath. I took his wet clothes to the laundry room to be washed, then went back upstairs to pick out some clothes for him to wear.  
  
I knocked on the door before entering the steamy bathroom, bringing a robe and towel along with me.  
  
“I’m not sure which one you prefer, so I brought both.”  
  
He looked over as I set them both down on the counter. “Hey, thanks.”  
  
“No problem.” I turned to leave but Chris called for me.  
  
“You should, uh... join me in here. If you don’t mind.”  
  
I was going to do just that, but there was one problem. “Chris! What about Layne?”  
  
His smile disappeared. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”  
  
I thought things were going fine between them. They looked like a perfect couple. What could have happened between them to make Chris unhappy?


	21. 21

**Chris’ POV  
 _(Part 1)_** _  
Two months ago_  
  
“Is everything okay, baby?”  
  
“I’m fine,” I lied. We finally finished. Well, only he did, but that was fine with me. As long as he was happy, I guess.  
  
I loved Layne, but I still didn’t believe I loved him as much as I should have. Everything I did for him didn’t seem like it was enough yet he was never demanding. He always reassured me that I was perfect to him, but I never believed him. I knew I wasn’t good enough for him. I would’ve told him how I felt, but his words wouldn’t help much. But I couldn’t keep it to myself for any longer.  
  
\----------  
  
 _(Part 2)_  
  
“I’m gonna go to bed now, babe,” Layne kissed my cheek before letting go of me. “It was nice cuddling with you.”  
  
“I think it’s time I do the same,” I yawned as we left the living room and went upstairs. After we entered our room, Layne gave me a slow, passionate kiss. I opened my mouth for him, and our tongues entered one another. He moaned into the kiss, his hands running up my back underneath my shirt.  
  
We stopped kissing to catch our breaths and remove each other’s clothes, and we were in bed within seconds.  
  
“Oh my god…” Layne whined as I started to move inside him at a slow rhythm. I planted soft kisses on his neck before lightly biting down on his skin, making the blonde gasp.  
  
After a while, everything went from slow and sweet to me pounding into him as he screamed into his pillow. We moaned as we reached our orgasms at the same time.  
  
"Oh, Jerry!"  
  
"Oh, Eddie..."  
  
The room fell silent except for heavy breathing while we stared at one another in a mix of emotions. Calling that moment embarrassing, heartbreaking, or maddening didn't even describe half of it. I knew whatever Layne felt was exactly what I felt as well. He was definitely as shocked and hurt as I was.  
  
We got out of bed, cleaned ourselves up, and got dressed without saying a word to one another. What were you supposed to say after a moment like that? After both you and your partner by mistake admit interest in different people. This called for an important discussion, but it wasn't a good time. Especially not for Layne. Surely he was on the verge of tears. Whenever my eyes were on him, he would avoid looking back at me.   
  
I wanted so badly to go over to him and hold him. I wanted to kiss his temple and tell him that everything would be okay. I couldn't bring myself to do it. It didn't make sense, and it seemed inappropriate. I wanted to comfort him because we both made the same mistake, but at the same time, it was exactly why I couldn't.  
  
I gave up. There was nothing I could say or do at the moment. The both of us having some time alone to think and calm down was a good idea, after all, so I left. I would later regret not bringing an umbrella along because the drizzling rain turned into a heavy downpour an hour later. I needed somewhere to go, but I wasn't ready to return home. Being alone didn't help matters much either, and I wanted someone to talk to.  
  
That was when I remembered Eddie. We didn't talk to each other for a couple months. He must've thought I was ignoring or abandoning him or something. Seeing him and hearing his voice again was instantly all I could think about. I needed him more than ever.   
  
What I also needed was to be honest with the people closest to me. Before I could do that, I needed to be honest with myself. I couldn't keep suppressing my true feelings anymore by trying to maintain two relationships, seeing as it failed for Layne and me.  
  
I went to the nearest payphone to get ahold of the man I truly loved all along.


	22. 22

**Eddie's POV**  
  
"With all that said, I'd say it's alright for you to join me," Chris said. "I'm pretty much single now, there's plenty of room for two of us in here, and I want you to wash my hair."  
  
"Uh, okay." I undressed and sat behind him in the tub. "I'm really sorry about all this, Chris."  
  
"No, I don't want you thinking this is your fault."  
  
I wet his hair and put shampoo in it. "But you said my name."  
  
"It's not your fault, Eddie."  
  
It was my fault. I ruined their relationship. I tried to prevent it, but it was no use.  
  
"Don't blame yourself for my mistake, okay?" he said.  
  
I had more to say, but my mouth stayed shut to keep from making Chris stressed. I knew they would break up because of me at this point. I urged him to stay with Layne to prevent this. The point wasn't to keep things between us a secret as much as it was to make sure he didn't get hurt. Not only were we on good terms, but he deserved to be with Chris more than I did. I wasn't sure where I fucked up, I just knew I did. Maybe it was bound to happen no matter what we did.  
  
We went to my bedroom to dry off when we finished bathing. Every now and then I glanced at him, but only for a second. These small glances turned into me staring at this gorgeous man. I couldn't take my eyes off him. I felt myself getting aroused by his perfect chest, his beautiful abs, and finally his--  
  
"Oh, Eddie?"  
  
I snapped out of my trance when I heard his voice. "Y-yeah? What's up?"  
  
He wrapped the towel around his waist and sat beside me on the bed. "There's one more thing I want to talk to you about."  
  
"Oh, what is it--"  
  
Chris took me by surprise when he leaned towards me, planting a lingering kiss on my lips. When he drew back, we stared at each other. It was then that I knew what he wanted, and that it was exactly what I wanted as well.  
  
He bit his lip and smiled. "You uh... already know what I wanted to say now, don't you?"  
  
I did, but I wanted him to say it anyway. I never believed I'd hear these words come out of his mouth, but tonight, my dreams were becoming true.  
  
"I love you, Eddie," his forehead gently pressed against mine as he spoke.


	23. 23

**Chris' POV**  
  
Eddie sat on my lap and pulled me into another kiss. Our lips crushed together, moving hungrily against each other. He let out soft moans as our kiss deepened and my tongue wandered into his mouth. He rocked his hips against me at a teasing, slow pace. I grunted and placed my hands on his hips, guiding him to increase the friction against my erection.  
  
We broke the kiss to catch our breaths. I couldn’t help but stare into his adorable blue eyes as I pictured all the things I wanted to do to him. At the same time, I didn't want to rush things too soon either. We waited this moment for so long, and I wanted it to be meaningful and enjoyable for the both of us.  
  
I stood in front of the bed and removed the towel. His cheeks turned red as he looked down at my erection.  
  
“You’re so damn cute,” I purred, running a hand through his hair. I lifted his chin with a gentle touch, forcing him to meet my gaze.   
  
He looked up at me with a smile as he took his robe off, letting me drink in the sight of his beautiful body. He lay on his back and spread one of his legs. He bit his lip as his hand trailed down his body until grasping his member. I dropped to my knees and left a trail of kisses down one of his thighs. He let out a small whine as I gave his cock a long, slow lick, from his shaft all the way to his tip. I let my tongue slide against him while I sucked him off. He held my hair away from my face and started moving his hips, pushing himself into my mouth faster.  
  
"Mmm, Chris," he moaned.  
  
I took it as a sign that he was about to come, so I stopped and got back on my feet.  
  
He held my member with one hand before taking me into his mouth, taking his time as he moved back and forth against me. I hissed as he slurped and moaned. My hands ran through his hair while I pushed him against my cock. He relaxed his throat more, allowing himself to take it completely. He held his place for a brief moment before pulling me out. He stroked my shaft and licked the slit of my member. I was nearing my climax, but we were only getting started. I lightly pushed him away before positioning him on his back.  
  
"Do you have any, uh... you know?"  
  
Eddie sat up. "Huh? Oh, yeah. Check that drawer. I think there's some in there."  
  
I went to the dresser for the bottle we needed, coated my member with the liquid. I closed and put away the bottle before slamming the drawer shut. I walked back over to Eddie, and inserted one of my fingers into him. His quivering moan turned me on. I wanted so bad to be inside him, and I knew the he wanted it as much as I did, if not more. He stroked himself and bit his lip as I pushed my finger in and out, and grunted as one more entered him. I moved my fingers with growing speed before pulling them out.  
  
He rolled over and crawled towards the pillows, resting his head against one and lay on his back. I came closer and pushed myself in, being as gentle as I could.  
  
I started moving in and out of him. "Does that feel good?"  
  
He gave a nod and a soft whimper in response.  
  
I groaned, throwing my head back. “Want me to go faster?”  
  
"Yes," his breathless voice spoke. As I thrust into him faster, he bit his lip and breathed heavily. His eyes were squeezed shut, and his hands gripped the sheets so tight that his knuckles turned white. We shared another kiss, groans passing between and into our mouths.   
  
His legs were over my shoulders as I fucked him harder. The sounds he made as my tip hit his prostate were like nothing I ever heard before.   
  
"Ugh, fuck!" He pumped his member and repeated my name, his voice growing louder until he came. I pulled out of him, removed the condom, and did the same. My eyes fluttered shut and my breath hitched as my climax came crashing over me, my dick throbbing as spilled my load all over his stomach. Neither of us moved as we panted, staring into each other's eyes.  
  
Eddie swallowed before he broke the silence between us. "Looks like it's time for another bath."


	24. 24

**Eddie's POV**  
  
The previous night was one I would never forget. I must've been lucky somehow for it to happen so soon. Not that there was anything wrong with that.  
  
Looking back, I was fortunate enough to meet Chris when I did. He was someone I could confide in because we both had the same problem. We were both people we thought we trusted and loved. But we realized that wasn't the case.  
  
For me, it wasn't until Ruth cheated on me and hit me. As for Chris, that was when both he and Layne admitted interest in different people. I felt awful about it, and I should have. Not because their separation was unavoidable, but because it was my fault. I couldn't see myself getting over it, despite Chris telling me not to blame myself.  
  
I woke up to the smell of food and coffee. I wanted to get out of bed, but I didn't want to disturb Chris. His head rested against my chest as he slept. He looked so peaceful and beautiful. I was slow and gentle as I moved his hair away from his face before I kissed his head. Then, he stirred a little, mumbling as he sat up. He stretched his arms and turned around to face me.  
  
"Good morning, beautiful," I smiled.  
  
He rubbed his eyes. "Mmm... good morning, babe. Did you have a good sleep?"  
  
"Yeah. Did you?"  
  
He nodded. "I'm still tired though. But I gotta get to work." He climbed out of bed, stretching his arms once more before putting on his clothes. I watched because I couldn't help myself, and I couldn't get over how attractive he was.  
  
"What are you looking at?" He turned around and asked in a playful tone.  
  
I didn't bother to keep myself from smiling. "N--nothing."  
  
He crossed his arms. "You were looking at my ass, weren't you?"  
  
"What if I was?"  
  
"Well..." he blushed as he trailed off.  
  
"'Well' what?"  
  
"We can settle it after work, babe."  
  
\----------  
  
Chris and I were in the kitchen finishing up the last of our breakfast.  
  
"Thanks a lot, Sean," Chris took our dishes off the table and brought them to the sink.  
  
Sean took a quick drag on his cigarette. "Don't worry about it. I'll wash those later."  
  
"It's fine, it'll only take a minute."  
  
"What were you up to last night?" I asked Sean.  
  
"Nothing much. Just chilling with Jerry and Layne."  
  
"Did... Layne tell you guys anything?" Chris asked.  
  
"That's the thing. He looked like something was wrong but he wouldn't tell us."  
  
"Fuck," he sighed. "I should talk to him after work."  
  
Sean leaned against the kitchen island. "Did something happen between you two?"  
  
"Yeah, it's bad." Chris looked at the clock then hurriedly dried his hands. "I have to go now, but I'll tell you about it later."  
  
"Crap, me too," Sean put on his jacket and picked up his keys. "Gotta get to the grocery store before it gets crowded. Want anything, Eddie?"  
  
I shook my head. "No, thank you."  
  
"Alright, I'll see you guys later," he said as he left.  
  
Chris zipped his coat up and gave me a quick kiss. "I have to go now. I'll miss you."  
  
"I'll miss you too, Chris."  
  
\----------  
  
I didn't do much while Chris and Sean were gone. I was in the middle of reading a book when Sean returned with the groceries. I got up and left it on the chair so I could help put everything away.  
  
"Hey, let me help you with that," I took half the bags he carried and set them down on the table.  
  
"Thanks, Eddie. It's kind of cold out there."  
  
"You think it'll snow?"  
  
He laughed. "It's Washington, so we'll never know."  
  
After we put everything away, we sat in the living room. Sean drank his coffee and watched TV, while I continued reading.


	25. 25

**Chris' POV**

I went to the bar with Stone, one of the guys I worked with. We were pretty close friends, but we never saw each other outside of work. We both lived very far away from one another and were too occupied with other things to make plans. But we managed to keep in touch the best we could. When he asked me to join him that Friday night, I agreed without thinking twice.

"So, how have you been?" he asked. "Is life treating you well?"

"Things are pretty good, yeah." I lit the cigarette between my lips. "What about you?"

I could tell he didn't believe me because he continued to stare at me.

I chuckled. "What? I'm fine, Stone. Really. Things are actually looking up for me now."

"I hope so. I really do. But... you didn't come to work for months and you stopped calling me. I got worried about you."

"I know, and I'm sorry."

"No, don't be. It's fine."

"I don't know how you convinced Kim to let me come back but I owe you one, that's for sure."

"Don't worry about it, alright? I'm just glad you're back." He leaned his head on his hand. "So how are the rest of your friends doing? How's Layne?"

I froze when I heard his name. I was so busy catching up with Stone that I forgot all about him.

"What's the matter, Chris?"

"N-nothing," I said a little too quickly. I looked all around the place for a clock, but there didn't seem to be one.

"Are you looking for the time?" Stone stared at his watch. "It's almost 10:30."

My eyes widened. "What the fuck? I've been here for four hours?"

"Hey isn't that Layne over there? Huh, he dyed his hair."

I looked ahead and saw him. He was sitting in front of the bar, wearing a black, fuzzy coat. His blonde curls were now pink.

"I'm gonna go talk to him. I'll be back."

When I got up, he was already leaving. By the time I got outside, I didn't see him anywhere. I heard no car drive off either. He could have stepped out for a smoke. It was cold out, so he shouldn't have gone far. A quick look around the building wouldn't hurt.

I almost reached the back of the building when I heard a slight groan. I stood still for a few seconds before continuing, my feet moving quieter against the pavement.

"Aww, fuck," someone hissed. It was the same voice as before, but neither of them came from Layne. Were two people having sex out here? In this cold weather?

Right after I turned the corner, I stopped dead in my tracks and turned the other way. I leaned against the cold brick wall so they couldn't see me. What I saw was nowhere near my reason for stepping out of the bar. My heart was pounding in my chest, so I took deep breaths to calm myself down. I took another look around the corner and the two people there were sharing a kiss. One of them stepped back into the light coming from inside the bar. I couldn't take my eyes off their curly, pink hair.

"We should have some more fun together sometime," the other man said as he handed over what looked like cash.

Layne giggled as he put it in his pocket. "I'm always a phone call away, sweetie."

They shared another small kiss before going back inside.


	26. 26

**Eddie's POV**  
  
I rubbed my eyes as Chris lay beside me. "How was your day?"  
  
"I think Layne's a prostitute."  
  
I almost went back to sleep but sat up and turned on the light. "A what now?"  
  
"A prostitute," he repeated. His tone was something between disgust and worry.  
  
"Did he tell you that?"  
  
He shook his head.  
  
"Then how do you know that?" I yawned. "You can't say something like that out of nowhere without--"  
  
"I--I saw him. He was..."  
  
"Did you catch him having sex with someone?"  
  
He shook his head again. "Not exactly."  
  
I lowered my voice. "Blowjob?"  
  
He nodded.  
  
To say that I was surprised by what he told me would be a lie. It must have been what Layne meant when he called himself a slut. At the time I assumed he was being self-deprecating. I never suspected that he was a sex worker, but everything made a bit more sense the more I thought about it.  
  
Chris gave a shaky sigh. "How long has he been doing this? What if he was cheating on me all along?"  
  
"Have you talked to him at all?"  
  
"No, but I was going to. I tried following him when he left the bar, and there he was." He sighed. "Oh well, how was your day?"  
  
"Eh, it was alright."  
  
"That's it?" He smiled. "Just 'alright'? Do anything interesting?"  
  
"Well, other than reading this book... and thinking about you, I didn't do much else."  
  
"Aww, I thought about you too, Eddie. I missed you."  
  
"I missed you too, Chris."  
  
"Come closer to me."  
  
As I lay down beside him, he gently moved my hair away from my face as he gave me a soft kiss. He rolled me over so he was on top and moved his mouth against my lips. I parted them and let out a faint moan as his tongue slowly entered my mouth, closing my eyes as I tasted the cigarettes and alcohol on his breath. I moaned into the kiss and held his hips as he moved them against me, his erection making contact with mine.  
  
He got off me to remove his underwear before doing the same to mine. He licked the precum from my tip before closing his lips around my cock, hollowing his cheeks as he moved up and down. I closed my eyes and swallowed, holding his hair away from his face as he took all of me into his mouth. Chris brought me pleasure I never felt before and I was addicted to it. There was no comparing him to any guy or girl I had sex with. He was more to me than a cute face, a hot body, or a good lay. But fuck was he perfect.  
  
"Chris..." I whispered.  
  
He stopped and stroked me a couple times before sitting on my lap. He moved his ass around against my cock, a lewd grin spreading across his face as he teased me. The longer he did it, the more it throbbed to his touch.  
  
"I can tell you're getting impatient," he said. Aligning himself with my tip, he pushed it inside him. My hands had a gentle grip on his waist while he lowered himself until I was completely inside him.  
  
"Fuck," he sighed as he started to move. "You're kind of bigger than what I'm used to, Ed."  
  
"Bigger than Layne?"  
  
He scoffed. "Oh definitely."  
  
I reveled in the sound of his breathing and moaning as he kept riding me, my hands caressing his thighs before squeezing his ass.  
  
He hissed. "I'm better than Ruth, aren't I?"  
  
"Fuuuck, yes!" I breathed. "Mmm, you're so much fucking better than her."  
  
"Yeah, I can fuck you better than she can, can't I?"  
  
I gave a silent nod.  
  
His cheeks were rosy and his mouth hung open while he bounced himself on my lap harder, his voice turning shaky and loud. He tossed his head back when I started stroking him, his clear and slick precum coating him.  
  
"Please don't stop," he whined. "I'm almost there baby."  
  
I felt my orgasm approaching as well. I bucked my hips into him, my cock slamming into him with more force causing him to yelp and grip the sheets.  
  
"Mmmh oh my god Eddie! Eddie I--" he cursed while spilling his seed in my hand.  
  
I kept fucking him, my thrusts and breathing growing faster until my orgasm finally took over, my member pulsating as I filled him with my seed. The sweat on my body cooled as I calmed down. Chris smirked, looking at me with half-lidded eyes of lust.  
  
"What?" I asked him.  
  
"Nothing, I... just really like how come feels inside me. That's all."  
  
I never knew hearing him talk so lewdly would be so hot.  
  
"You're turned on again, aren't you?"  
  
I blushed. "Maybe...?"  
  
"Do you want to fuck me again?" he leaned down towards me, our mouths nearly touching.  
  
"...maybe?" I smiled as we closed the space between our lips.


	27. 27

**Chris' POV**  
  
I was ready to approach Layne and talk to him about the incident, as well as the new questions I had for him. What I saw last night would be more difficult to bring up but it had to be done. No more staying at home and procrastinating.  
  
I gave the front door a few firm knocks, and it wasn't long before I heard his soft voice from inside.  
  
"Who is it?"  
  
The door opened before I could answer him, and the smile on his face faded the moment he saw me. We stared into each other's eyes in silence for a moment until he let me inside.  
  
"What do you want?" he asked as I followed him into the living room.  
  
"I wanted to talk to you... about what happened the other night."  
  
He turned around to face me and sighed. "I wanted to talk to you too Chris, but... I don't know where to start."  
  
"You could start by telling me about Jerry."  
  
He went quiet, taking a deep breath and rubbing his face. At that point, I knew beating around the bush wouldn't get me the answers I wanted.  
  
"Layne, are you fucking Jerry?"  
  
"It's not like that--"  
  
"Answer the question."  
  
"Why would you think I'm cheating on you with Jerry?"  
  
"Layne just tell me the truth! Please!"  
  
"Alright, fine!" he rolled his eyes. "Before I met you, Jerry and I were dating. And everything was perfect yet I dumped him for no reason like a fucking idiot. And I hurt him because I'm so stupid. I never saw someone so heartbroken because of me and I felt so guilty I wanted to die. It took us years to start talking again and we agreed to let it go but I can't. I can't fucking let it go because no matter what I do, he'll never forgive me and nothing will make things better for us!"   
  
Sniffling, he wiped the tears from his face with his sleeve. That was far from what I expected to hear, and I felt like an asshole after hearing him start to explain himself.  
  
"I shouldn't have assumed you were cheating on me, Layne. I'm sorry. Do you still have feelings for him?  
  
"I--um... uh... not exactly. I mean... god, I don't know. I've tried my best to move on. I started going out again, and... and then I met you." He smiled and gave a dreamy sigh. "I just... I was so in love with you. Well, I still am... I thought I'd finally get over him now that I have you. But it isn't working, Chris. Nothing's fucking working!"  
  
I had trouble thinking of how to respond to him. There was so much going on in Layne's head that I wasn't aware of and likely wouldn't understand. Helping him with a problem like this was impossible. I approached him and let him put his arms around me, his body trembling as he sobbed.  
  
"Layne..." I spoke softly, ending the long silence. "I wish you told me all this sooner."  
  
He sniffled again. "I know. I'm sorry Chris. You're probably thinking I was leading you on this whole time."  
  
"No, I don't think that, Layne!"  
  
"Well, I... wouldn't blame you if you did. I haven't been as honest as I should have been. And... I love you. I love you so much but I just can't him out of my head, Chris! No matter what I do! No matter who I'm with! It's like it's fucking haunting me! It's haunting me because I took him for granted and hurt him! God, I'm such a selfish fucking idiot! Then again, maybe... maybe this is the price I have to pay. Maybe I... don't deserve love."  
  
"Don't say that. Everyone makes mistakes."  
  
"But for me it's different! I... I fucked up. Really fucking bad. Relationships will... never be the same again. Nothing between Jerry and I will never be like they used to. Hell, we're not even fucking friends. We have no... actual friendship. You know, like I do with Sean. Or like you and Eddie. Jerry and I, we... just tolerate each other, I guess. Since we have the same mutual friends and all."  
  
We slowly released one another and he wiped the side of his face with his left sleeve. "So, I... I'm sorry, about the other night. I know it was really awkward, and that upset you. I hate making people upset. It makes me feel like shit."  
  
His hands cupped my face, pulling me into a kiss. He moved his mouth against my closed lips and I instinctively opened them, letting the kiss deepen. We moaned into each other's mouths as our tongues made contact, our hands caressing one another while we made out. In an instant, I realized what I was doing and I separated myself from him.  
  
"I shouldn't have done that, I'm so sorry Layne!"  
  
"What? What are you talking about? We--" he went silent. He furrowed his brows and clenched his fists. His trembling lips formed a frown. "...no."  
  
I didn't say a word because he clearly figured the truth out on his own.  
  
"No. No no no no no NO! FUCK!" His heavy breathing became loud and unsteady as tears came down his face.  
  
"Layne..." my heart was racing. "I had something to tell you."  
  
"Y--you're fucking Eddie now, a--aren't you?"  
  
"Um... look, it's more complicated than that--"  
  
"You've been fucking him behind my back?!" He raised his voice as he charged towards me. I held his arms back so he couldn't hit me, as much as I deserved every swing at me he wanted to take.  
  
"Layne, listen to me--"  
  
"Let go!"  
  
"No, you need to calm down and listen to me, Layne."  
  
"Fucking let GO of me!" he sobbed, trying to squirm out of my tight grip.  
  
"Layne... when I went away for a few days, I left with Eddie to--"  
  
"Just fucking say it Chris!" he yelled.  
  
"Let me finish," I resumed, softening my own voice in hopes that he would do the same. "Eddie and I went to California for a bit so he could get away from Ruth and maybe take his mind off her. While I was there... I thought about some things, and realized... well, a lot. Like... the feelings I had for Eddie."  
  
"And that's when you fucked him, right?"  
  
"No, Layne--"  
  
"You almost did, huh?"  
  
"...okay, yes. We almost did that one time, but that's not the point."  
  
"What the fuck do you mean 'that one time'?" he pushed and pulled, still failing to make me release him. "It's true, isn't it?! You did have sex with him!"  
  
"Last night, yeah. And the night I left."  
  
"Fuck you! And let go of me you fucking cheater!" he shouted as he continued the squirm. "You fucking LIED to me, Chris! You never fucking loved me!"  
  
"That's not true, Layne. I love you with all my heart--"  
  
"Bullshit!"  
  
"I'm being honest, Layne. I love you. But like I told you before, I don't love you as much as you deserve. I'm not good enough for someone like you. And now you know it."  
  
I saw no more rage in his eyes, but he had every right to feel however he felt about it all. My grip on his arms loosened before letting them go.  
  
"I'm so sorry, Layne. For doing stupid shit and hurting you. I know what I'm saying isn't going to make anything better but you deserve to know what I did and why. You deserve to know the truth. You deserve so much better than... than me." I stopped when I got choked up. I said everything that needed to be said on my end, even if it wouldn't change how he felt in the slightest.  
  
His expression became calm. His arms were folded but he was no longer frowning. "Why do you say things like that? That you're not good enough for me, you don't deserve me and all that crap? You've been saying this even before you did something wrong. Look, forget about Eddie and... whatever is going on between you two. I don't like you being hard on yourself like this. Stop saying you didn't deserve me like I'm an innocent person because I'm far from that."  
  
"I don't get what you're--"  
  
"Yes you do," he smirked. "You know I'm a hooker and you found that out last night."  
  
"Wait a minute, how did you know?"  
  
"I saw you from the corner of my eye when I went back in. I was hoping you'd follow me inside and grill me about it or something, but it must've freaked you out.  
  
"Of course it did! I've spent months under stress over having to choose between two people I love, only to find out you're basically cheating on me too! What the fuck, Layne? And how long have you been doing this?"  
  
"More than two years?"  
  
"Two years..." I repeated. Not only was he guilty too but he was being hypocritical on top of it. If this were anyone else, I would have thrown some something at him, or hit him, or punched a hole in a wall. Anything to physically express my anger. I couldn't bring myself to lay a hand on anyone at all, let alone Layne. But that would be unnecessary anyway, and I couldn't bring myself to move a muscle if I wanted to.  
  
"I'm a hypocrite, I know. I'm sorry Chris. I couldn't imagine how you would react to this at any point before this, but now you know."  
  
"Neither of us are innocent, Layne. There's no use in arguing anymore, but I'm glad we were able to clear things up."  
  
"Yeah. Some way to spend an anniversary, huh?" he laughed.  
  
He was right. On that day we would've been together for a full year.  
  
"I guess we're through, huh?"  
  
"Well, yeah I guess so."  
  
"Then I want nothing but for Eddie and you to be happy together. I mean it."  
  
"Aww, thank you, Layne. Oh! I should probably go now. I have to be at work soon."  
  
"Oh! Alright. But, Chris?" He gently pulled my hand before I could leave.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
I turned around and was caught off guard by the lingering kiss Layne gave me.  
  
"I'm sorry for screaming at you. And thanks for stopping by and talking to me again. It was great to see you."  
  
I kissed his forehead. "You too, Layne."


	28. 28

**Eddie's POV**

"And he was just... okay with it?" I asked.

Chris shrugged. "I think so. I don't know, it's confusing. He was so upset, Ed. He was crying, screaming at me, and trying to hit me. But afterward, he's happy for us?"

"You think he meant that?"

A small sigh. "I'm not sure."

That afternoon with Layne bothered Chris for days. Even though I wasn't there, it seemed off to me too. But maybe we were just overthinking things.

"So," Chris lay his head against my lap. "Are you excited about your birthday?"

"I haven't thought about it too much, honestly." I lay my head against the back of the living room couch.

"Really? But it's a special day! Don't you want to do something exciting to celebrate?"

I rolled my eyes. "It's just another day. Not that special."

"Well, it is to me. And it's a few weeks away." he sat up. "Look, if you could have anything in the world, what would that thing be?"

"I already ha--"

"You can't say me, that doesn't count." He spoke with a wide smile.

"How?"

"...I can't gift wrap myself."

"You don't have to do that. It's only gonna get in the way."

Chris squinted. "Of what? My d--"

The phone in the kitchen started ringing, but neither of us got up to answer it at first.

"Wait, I should get that," Chris got up. "I'm supposed to hear from Stone today."

"Who's that?"

"My friend," he called out from the other room. "He's really cool, you'll meet him soon."

"When?"

He peered around the corner. "Can't tell you just yet."

"Is this some sort of surprise?"

"Something like that."

I kept the rest of my questions to myself and let Chris talk to his friend. I could bug him about Stone and the surprise when he's done.


	29. Chapter 29

**Chris' POV**

Stone and I went to his place after work. He said I looked stressed all day but wanted to wait until the day was over to say anything. He was right about me being stressed since I was getting worse by the day at hiding things. But that had nothing to do with what was going on in my head.

While Stone rolled a joint, I told him everything. About Ruth, Eddie, Layne, and everything in between. I was stuck on Layne, most of all. Either I was overthinking things, or he said something he didn't mean. The more I thought about it, the more I asked myself if it really mattered which one it was.

"You know what really fucks me up though? Out of all this?"

"What's that?" Stone mumbled, bringing the joint to his lips before lighting it.

"That I'll never know the truth."

He took a long hit, holding his breath for a moment before letting the smoke pass his lips. "Do you want to know?"

"If it causes more stress, then no."

Stone passed the joint to me and I took a drag, closing my eyes as the smoke filled my lungs. Leaning back against the couch, I exhaled. "I need to get over this. Like, if finding out keeps me from moving on from the past and being with Eddie, then I don't fucking care. No business talking to Layne anymore anyway. I'm done with Ruth and I'm done with him too."

"Now that I know I can stop saving face, I can finally say Ruth was always an asshole."

I chuckled and took a quick hit. "Even in school?"

He nodded. "I turned her down and she decided she didn't like me anymore."

"Sounds just like her," I scoffed, passing the joint to him.


End file.
